With regards to your edit
there are the exceptions of heir and their and weird. I'm sure there's more.
( DarkSideOfTheSpoon is 100% back, for now anyway., Sat 21 Oct 2006, 19:13, archived)

The full rule is
'I before E, except after C, when it rhymes with Bee. Otherwise, vice versa'

However, this still falls down on 'sieve'
( Cap'n Tallbeard, Sat 21 Oct 2006, 19:16, archived)

*head assplodes*

( Wingnutt razzle dazzle my fantasmagazzle, Sat 21 Oct 2006, 19:17, archived)

Pffft
We had a big poster of it in our maths classroom
( Cap'n Tallbeard, Sat 21 Oct 2006, 19:18, archived)

English you mean
surely?
( Wingnutt razzle dazzle my fantasmagazzle, Sat 21 Oct 2006, 19:21, archived)

No, I didn't do A-Level English
It was actually further maths and there were only six of us, so we got the tiny classroom that the retards' English class used
( Cap'n Tallbeard, Sat 21 Oct 2006, 19:23, archived)