Good job you leave yourself plenty of time to arrange it, you nobber.
Send her naked photos of yourself with "Happy Valentine's Day" scrawled all over your body. Real neck-to-ankles, every inch covered in writing. And book her a strip-o-gram, classy like.

If'you don't fancy "Happy Valentine's Day", try "I like cheese", "scaryclowns-scaryclowns-scaryclowns" or "I'm not the Solihull Strangler" for alternative messages.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 13 Feb 2007, 9:27, archived)

Hehe I like this
minus the strippogram bit

Me: I would like to order a stripper for an address in Athens
Them: A pet-tetetetetetetetetetet-Chris Waddle
Me: How much?
( prem1um is full of life, Tue 13 Feb 2007, 9:29, archived)

Shit the bed
and post her the sheets
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Tue 13 Feb 2007, 9:30, archived)