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good morning JMG

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:06, archived)
I'm not on long.
I was just watching a Stern episode with dwarf tossing.
I was ROFL for a good 2 hours.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:07, archived)
I'm just taking a break from shagging Kylie, Alyson Hannigan and Prince Harry
while smoking an LSD reefer and injecting marijuana resin into my eyeballs

later I'm going to listen to a speech by the head boy then wank in front of a mirror while the dog licks peanut butter off my arse

that's how cool I am tonight, how about you?
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:11, archived)
I think Head Boy is the new School Bully.
God I wish I was back at school. I could punch children all day long.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:12, archived)
and snort cocaine off them?

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:13, archived)
GENIUS!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:15, archived)
Later I let the headmaster spank me
for having a life that might be slightly too interesting for /talk.





because obviously nobody would believe me.
(I helped save b3ta! KernKraft Gosh, there isn't much noise outside today, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:28, archived)
go and sleep off your alcopops, this conversation would still be boring even if I believed you

(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:32, archived)
Unfortunately I HAVE been drinking alcopops
and therefore by some sort of crazy logic I'm a gay right?


I don't care if nobody believes me, but like I said, this makes me more proud than osama bin laden on september 12th 2001, so being that nobody is really going to post anything interesting on the board, I thought I might aswell come out with it and see what abuse I get for having an adventurous life for once in a while.
(I helped save b3ta! KernKraft Gosh, there isn't much noise outside today, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:38, archived)
christ you're dull
I'm astounded by your dullness

you really are just indescribably dull and tedious

go to bed, have a good old wank and wait for mummy to bring you a cup of tea in the morning you dull child
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:40, archived)
I'm sorry oh great gilgamesh, for offending your sensibilties
from now on I will only post random bollocks on the talk board at half four in the morning when all of three people are on it.

I wouldn't want to make your life more dull than it already is now would I? What with you being on an internet message board at quarter to five in the morning.
(I helped save b3ta! KernKraft Gosh, there isn't much noise outside today, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:45, archived)
I never said you offended me
I just said you're a dull little child with an over-active imagination who can't eat three wine gums without getting wankered
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:46, archived)
Well in all honestly you don't KNOW that now do you?
If Id've said "oh yeah I drank 15 pints" then fair enough, I would've imagined I was lying. But I've been on b3ta long enough to know that people who boast about how much they've drank are usually dickheads.

So what, yeah I ate three wine gums and nearly passed out; guess I'm a terrible person aren't I? I don't think it really matters to be honest

If I was lying I would've said I shagged a pair of 18 year old blonde twins whilst drinking moet from their vaginas.

fact is I didn't, I pulled a slightly overwieght 30 year old with pretty eyes who, upon talking to her, happened to deal cocaine as a sideline- I asked her if I could "snort coke off her naked body" mostley as a joke and she said yeah.

If you choose to believe this isn't true, and I'm actually fucking sad enough to make up a story to three or four people on an internet message board at 5 in the morning, then be my guest; just don't have a go at me about it- because you have no idea how true it ACTUALLY is and it's none of your cunting business, you're not king of /talk
(I helped save b3ta! KernKraft Gosh, there isn't much noise outside today, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:58, archived)
WOBBLE! BIG FAT FUCKING WOBBLE!
TL:DR
(I helped save b3ta! Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 4:59, archived)
I'm RISing all over this.

(I helped save b3ta! KernKraft Gosh, there isn't much noise outside today, Sat 30 Jun 2007, 5:08, archived)