Turn up drunk
and start a fight.

You'll never be asked to put a bed up again.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 9:33, archived)

She's a girl,
I'll get drunk while making the bed and say something like "lets test it out love" before passing out with my head on a sick covered toilet seat.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 May 2009, 9:35, archived)

If it's a girl
turn up with an obvious erection and keep winking at her.

Shell ask you to leave.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 11 May 2009, 9:36, archived)

She'll just think that's my alan key.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 11 May 2009, 9:38, archived)