Real tomatoes, fresh basil
Garlic, red wine and grated onion.

Fuck bacon and carrots up their hairy shitter.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:53, archived)

I have to avoid booze as I am serving children
I'd love fresh basil though, I may have to venture out to a shop
( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

Irrellevant when cooking
you cant get pissed on meat that's been flavoured with wine.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

I worry that not all the booze will be gone
and my children will be poisoned
( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

Then you are a fucking idiot

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:56, archived)

*sulks*

( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:57, archived)

Actually
It turns out I am a fucking idiot.

If you put red wine in your Bolognese sauce and simmer it for half an hour it will retain 35% of the alcohol.

I've given it to my kids and they havent died to be fair.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 10:00, archived)

AHA! *glee*
I know the fussy bastards in the family would complain if I added wine too.
( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 10:01, archived)

Do they smack the teacher's face and shout, "Look at thish playsh! Ish a fucking mesh!"

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 10:03, archived)

I forgot to add
MINCED COW.

MINCED DEAD COW.

MINCED DEAD COW THAT DIED IN PAIN.

DIED IN PAIN PURELY FOR MY CARNIVEROUS DALLIANCES.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

I am so turned on right now.

( hoifbjifbef, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)

Yeah, not those crazy newfangled fake tomatoes.
*shakes fist*

Coming over here, stealing our jobs.
( The Baroness The Harlot Pimpernel, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 9:54, archived)