I like wanking onto a digestive and pelting it at passers by from my window whilst laughing like a fog horn
I call it Ultimate Jizzbee.

I started doing loads of sit ups and press ups last night, and on my last struggled press up a massive flappy fart came out. I started laughing so hard I couldn't do anymore exercise.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:37, archived)

I sometimes wank to the Rocky theme so it feels like I'm working out.

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:39, archived)

likewise, but I run up stairs whilst slapping hap hazzardly at my penis.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:41, archived)

that's one step away
from weightlifting so much you shit yourself inside out, DG. Consider it a warning.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:39, archived)

Like this?
www.asstulip.net/busted_gut.php

OMG NSFW SRSLY ITS AN ANUS
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:41, archived)

PROLAPSE TO VICTORY

(thediscokingpin, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:42, archived)

THE GREAT ASSGAPE

( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:45, archived)

That's why I always do barbells on the toilet.
1 *boop* 2 *boiip* 3 *ploplop* 4 *fffrrrrt* 5 *BOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRG SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH SPLASH GLUGGLUGGLUGGLUGGLUGGLUGGLUG BOOOORRRRRRTT PLAT PLAT PLAT* 6 *plop* 7 *.......* 8! done!

*pulls up trousers*

*bloop*

ah fuck.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:45, archived)

NURSE!!!

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:52, archived)

Plarp!

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:40, archived)

hahaha

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 11 Feb 2010, 10:42, archived)