TFD, I have some good news, and some bad news... depending on your point of view.
There was this girl on OKCupid who rated me 4 out of 5, and has really nice bazookas, and is into cooking and making things on the internet. So I wrote her a message asking her out and all that, and she replied, so I replied, but then no replies for a few days.... So, and this is where you come in, seeing as how she doesn't really want me (I don't think), that means that I'm free for the time being to date someone else, do you see where I'm going with this? So, if you could just set up your facebook's relationship status to engaged with me, that will get the ball rolling.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 12:02, archived)

Well thanks a lot Gonz,
I would dearly love to be your rebound but you broke my heart last time and I'm just not sure I could trust myself to be vulnerable with you again.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 12:10, archived)

Can I fuck you, please?

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 12:13, archived)

Fuck off.
You love your wife too much har har.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Fri 17 Jun 2011, 12:16, archived)