1) Download cracked copy of Ableton Live 9 from Teh P****e B*y
2) Follow tutorial that comes with the program
3) Start by ripping off samples from tunes you like
4) Record extra bits from whatever 'real' instruments you have lying around
5) Basically fuck around and have fun
6) Profit

It worked for me. Well, apart from the profit bit. But I'm working on that.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 14 May 2015, 12:23, archived)

Rather embarrasingly, I already own Ableton Live
but I couldn't get it to work. It drove me to the point of wanting to throw the computer out of the window.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:24, archived)

Hmm, can't help you there I'm afraid.
What version? I found the tutorial that came with version 9 was enough to get started with, and I'd never used any comparable software before.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 14 May 2015, 12:26, archived)

Or do you mean the software won't actually run properly?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 14 May 2015, 12:28, archived)

I don't recall now, it was a long time ago
Perhaps I'll give it another crack. Cheers though :)
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:31, archived)

you need to get a bird with big hooters to dance on a video

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 14 May 2015, 12:25, archived)

brb, gazzing WW.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 14 May 2015, 12:26, archived)

azzing uiltily wanking over
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 14 May 2015, 13:07, archived)