I just didn't understand why he couldn't learn to slice that apple up neatly with his sword
Every week he'd make an amateurish mess of it *again.* I believed growing up would be a process of finally learning to go swishyswishychipchop in midair and the apple would fall in elegant, perfect slices like you were the coolest mf ever to get their apple-slicing shit together. boys and girls would swoon helplessly. you'd just side-eye the world like *sheesh, of course, no biggie* and run off with the best-looking one. Now, a life lived, and I realise that slicing the apple up badly isn't a stage, isn't an escapable situation. it's what we are, who we are. I throw another apple up into the air. It hovers indefinitely, beyond time. Maybe this week, I tell myself. I start to slice
( vladimir, Sun 30 Mar 2025, 11:28, Reply)

It's because 17th-century France was a world without Fruit Ninja.

( .Yeti., Sun 30 Mar 2025, 11:30, Reply)

oh I've just looked this up I see this is a game
out in 2010, is it possible that Dogtanion was a distant inspiration
( vladimir, Sun 30 Mar 2025, 11:33, Reply)

Perhaps we are all, ourselves, merely apples aloft in life's great Dogtanian opening sequence.
Just wending our haphazard way along life's great path. Not unlike Porthos' smeggy gunt, swaying in the Parisian breeze.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 30 Mar 2025, 11:44, Reply)

beautiful and full of truth, keats couldn't have put it better

( vladimir, Sun 30 Mar 2025, 11:56, Reply)