you: look my friend, there aren't enough parsecs to put between me and Wat Monthop, if he knows I'm in his bar right now I'll be twelve kinds of dead and so will you. Don't draw ANY attention to us ok, and we should be able to get out of here with most of our limbs still attached
( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:00, archived)

me: *immediately putting on chicken costume and sparkly waistcoat, playing a one-man-band set-up* what like this do you mean
( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:01, archived)

you: *from underneath table* not like that no
( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:02, archived)

please stop liveblogging and start making up Star Wars bullshit

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Tom Cruise piss films, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:05, archived)

Pffffff
( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:06, archived)

Wat Monthop: *reaching for drystone-handled lightsaber from beneath bar* eh up oo disturbs the peace of my spacebar
( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:05, archived)

you: oh that's just great just fucking great
me: sorry porcy *three more drumrolls and a parp on the trumpet* is this helping
Wat: *advancing* well if it isn't the scum of the ten galaxdales. Cross my fields will you lad I'll not forget
you: *tunelling into the ground frantically* not really no
( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 11:10, archived)

a disney+ contract is in the post

( Invisible Wizard - 13th Level Scrote, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 15:07, archived)

pffffffff THANK YOU

( vladimir, Fri 24 Jul 2026, 15:32, archived)