Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Hey, you know how I'm old and boring and never do stuff?Well, today, completely on the spur of the moment, we've decided to go to the pictures. I know, right? Rock and roll.
What was the last spontaneous thing you did? Did you regret it afterwards? Was it worth it?
Alt: no alt question. Just an order. Do something spontaneous today. Then tell the internet.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:32,
218 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
I spontaneously combusted earlier this morningI'm still pretty burnt up about it tbh.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:36,
Reply)
I think this poll needs to be brought back up in response to that "joke"Who's the best poster
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:39, Reply)
You fool! Wednesdays are the time to go or Tuesdays for the cheap tickets.(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:37, Reply)
But Thursday is the day that Biscuit is in playschoolso we can galavant.
Also, because we're seeing a matinee performance, it's cheaper anyway.
Plus, it's showing in the posh director's hall, which has huge comfy seats with tables and tons of leg room.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:39,
Reply)
Avengers.I wasn't desperate to see it or anything, but all of the saddos on here have been raving about it, and himself likes action films, so it should be good.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:42,
Reply)
It's pretty good, if you get bored of the action just watch Scarlett Johansons arse.(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:44, Reply)
When there's Chris Hemsworth to look at?No thanks.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:45,
Reply)
OH NO!She's goign to be two or three pounds out of pocket D:
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Kroney, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:39,
Reply)
It's that sort of thinking that caused the euro problems Frenchy .(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:41, Reply)
Sunday & Mondays is £3.20 for a ticket at the local cinema hereIt's only a one screen place, but they let you take in your own stuff, so it's excellent.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:39,
Reply)
That's pretty good.This is one of the chains, so they tend to frown on that sort of thing.
Saying that, we're both on diets anyway, so there won't be any massive bags of sweets. Just huge, overpriced drinks.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:41,
Reply)
We've taken in booze before, but that was simply because the shop would be shut by the time we got outWe didn't even bother to open it in there, which we've since considered a missed opportunity.
Saw MIB3 there on Sunday, quite enjoyed that
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:42,
Reply)
we went to a mexican restaurant on saturday nightthe 'food' was lovely, the only problem was we couldn't tell exactly what the 'food' was
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:38, Reply)
they did but then when the food arrived it was all like wtf?it was a variety of veg, cheese, meat pastes and non-meat pastes
tasted lovely, but a bit worrying for my vegetarian girlfriend
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:49, Reply)
I threw caution to the wind only last night, decided not to cook and ordered a takeaway.I know. Amazing stuff. Max Clifford is negotiating the rights to this story.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:38,
Reply)
I can't wait for the serialisation.Will it be in the Sun or the Mirror?
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:39,
Reply)
I would hope foil containers(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:48,
Reply)
Lamb in blackbean sauce, hot and sour prawns, salt & pepper squid, bok choi & rice.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:59,
Reply)
Same as Battered for me, ordered a takeaway a couple of nights back as I couldn't be bothered to cookJust got a couple of pizzas between us. My only regret is the cost, but they are damn good pizzas.
Alt: No.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:41,
Reply)
I'm not allowed near the playground anymore, otherwise I would.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:47,
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You're not old, probably boring.Now that the old mans clapped out you should be dressing a bit racier and try to attract a younger gentleman this time, maybe 40 on the clock, hopefully no baggage like kids this time, maybe a failed marriage behind him, that kindof thing. What with the better weather you should pop down Jacques Verts and get a nice top that shows off those chesticles of yours.
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:45,
Reply)
You should totally take over from Dear Deidre.You'd be aces.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:46,
Reply)
Life advice and now fashion tips?Is there no end to your abilities?
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Kroney, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:46,
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I HOPE ALL THE CHICKS CHECK THIS POST OUT(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:49,
Reply)
I've just checked that website site outthat biscuit looks more retarded than happy; I hope this doesn't spoil the venture
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:53,
Reply)
My penis has its own post code(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:56,
Reply)
"Chesticles" makes me want to punch you in the facewhich I suppose is the point.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:47, Reply)
Sarah Kennedy used to say it a lot.And she was eminently punchable.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 10:48,
Reply)
It was that or 'breasticles' I would have posted sooner but I was torn(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:48,
Reply)
If you haven't yet seen Tucker and Dale vs Evil. Make sure you watch it soon. (, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:47, Reply)
I put it on in the background whilst I was cleaning and I'd forgotten how good it was. It is definitely a laugh out loud film.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:50, Reply)
"I never thought I'd say this, but I'm glad I'm not hung like a bear."(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:16,
Reply)
Went out for drinkies today. My spontaneity is limited for the next few weeks.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:52, Reply)
Just say drinks, drinkies should be reserved to exceptionally camp and overweight queens who work in the thearter.(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:57, Reply)
IM JUST TRYING TO HELP HER KEEP HER NEW FOUND FRIENDS!I'm like a manly fairy godmother.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:04, Reply)
Yesterday, went kite flying, made weed brownies, and picked my next tattoo. Kite flying and brownies were/are awesome/breakfast.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:56, Reply)
No, I don't really like brownies but couldn't be arsed to make icing for cupcakes.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:01, Reply)
this is probably what i would do if i had a weight problem and no wife/girlfriend or life of my own(, Thu 31 May 2012, 10:58, Reply)
No it isn't, what you would do is create vast amount of annoying sock puppet accounts and flood OT with shite.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:02, Reply)
yeah that probably would be an option if i was overweight and had no girlfriend or wife and that toobut as this is my only account, and you have many, i guess we're both winners here
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:03, Reply)
We only have your word that you have a missus. Considering that you're a sock puppet anyway forgive me if I don't take everything you say as verbatim.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:07, Reply)
I learnt my lesson with the last few I posted so forgive me if I keep this one to myself.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:10, Reply)
Mona Lisa smoking a joint.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:13,
Reply)
Damn I was going to be really clever and say _ _ _ _ and Hake, but couldn't think of a fish that has four letters and sounds a bit like love.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:14, Reply)
Get some more fingers and you can haveen.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louvar
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:17, Reply)
I heard an elderly motorist got stuck in their after blindly following his sat nav(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:22,
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This made me LOL, then feel thoroughly ashamed.(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:28,
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It is amusing that the fact that I wasn't able to run a marathon is the one thing you think you have on me.(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:22, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!You fucking loser!!!! You can't run a marathon!!!!
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:24, Reply)
I don't have anything on you, nor would I want to. I just enjoy you being all smug and superior then flaking out. I want nothing to do with you Al.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:23, Reply)
No, you see if you wanted nothing to do with me, you wouldn't have responded at alland you wouldn't have tried to be my friend on facebook.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:25, Reply)
he was only friending you so he could unfriend youit's a thing now
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:25, Reply)
have you run any before? i bet you haveand i bet the most running thundercunt ever did was when mars ice cream was on 2 for 1 at Lidl
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:24, Reply)
oh man i love MArs ice cream, not had one in years though(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:28,
Reply)
me neither, my gf mentioned them the other dayand i was like awww cos the shop only had cornettos left
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:29, Reply)
i like a bit of thembut i can't manage a whole one, far too sickly. they should make mini ones.
YOU should make them, and then bring them round here, and feed them to me. provided that you look like bradley cooper, and not a stooping stoopneck, that is.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:32,
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NO, FUCK YOUEither way, Feast is the best ice cream.
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:34,
Reply)
you're both wrongcrunchie bar ice creams, with the little chunks of crunchie in them, are the best ice cream bars.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:42,
Reply)
mint feasts are betterbut they are no crunchie-bar.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:45,
Reply)
You just like putting honey and nougat flavoured ice cream up your fanny.(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)
No way, I hate running, I like riding my bike though. Would you like to come on a bike ride?
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:30, Reply)
no thanks, last time I rode your mum I caught the clap(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:33,
Reply)
I don't feel the need to compete with Q, he is uniqueI also wouldn't compete with you, but that's because I'ma welterweight not super heavyweight
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:38,
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fuck quentinwhere are my mini marsbar ice creams? fuck him right in his disappointing arse.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:40,
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I think he failed in the Bradley cooper part of that requestI however...
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:42,
Reply)
Fucking Mini Cooper more like(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:44,
Reply)
WHAT I HAVE BEEN HERE MORE THAN 6 MONTHS AND HAVE GIVEN MANY DETAILS OF MY LIFEWEHY ARE THERE STILL PEOPLE HERE STUPID ENOUGH TO THINK THIS?
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:13, Reply)
I got hammered on Tuesdaydespite saying - and absolutely intending - to only have 'one or two'. Sadly those 'one or two' were in litre bottle form.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:05, Reply)
I think we may need to stage an intervention(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 31 May 2012, 11:07,
Reply)
Perfectly unnecessaryThere's half a bottle of wine in my fridge from the weekend, and just looking at it when I opened the fridge to get my breakfast this morning made me feel queasy.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:09, Reply)
if i get change tonight, i will upload the pics of you doing exactly thathahaha have just remembered barry looking at you, and saying in bewilderment, "oh i thought you were a bloke."
just what every girl wants to hear.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:28,
Reply)
Somebody needs to hold an intervention for Sean Beanwww.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/4347646/Sean-Beans-not-looking-so-Sharpe.html
(Sorry for it being The Sun)
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:08,
Reply)
What the fuck is wrong with looking a bit rough and buying beer.I mean carling is shit, but he is northern.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:10, Reply)
It was pretty much the state of the bandage, rather than anything else that made me think 'Yup, that man has a problem'It's OK to look a bit rough after a night out, but he clearly hasn't washed or cleaned himself for days.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:13,
Reply)
It's alright being a pisscan hollywood actor who's obviously been drink driving in a tracksuitbut I draw the line of forgiveness at having bought gay carling pisswater
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:10,
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I don't mind trampjuice, only if it's been chilled first though, there I've said it, there's no going back(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:14,
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Carling tastes like shiteIt is only acceptable to drink at a festival
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:20,
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That's right, if you are going to drink shite lagerIt makes sense to be paying way over the odds for it and to have to drink it out of a shit plastic cup.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:26,
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As opposed to nothing was the point I was making here tangles(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:30,
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You make a convincing argument, sportoNothing is not really an option.
My advice is to stay away from corporate festivals.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:34,
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You should get a tattoo of his face on your buttock(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:21,
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Where has Sean Bean?Up Bobby's shitpipe
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:22,
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Cor it's Phil Spencer!!I only see a brick wall, but Phil sees so much more than that
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:21,
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Phil andthunder cunt see the secrect symblols that let fellow gayers no that there be bumming inside(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:24,
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I would have expected him to live in a big swanky mansion, that little piece of wall looks like a povvo house.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:24, Reply)
Could be his garage or outhouse(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:25,
Reply)
Primrose Hill is known for it's poor quality accomodation(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:25,
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He's Belsize Park, any kind of house round there'll be 3 million plusSTINKING POVVO
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:25,
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First carling and now this :(he'll have to sign up for another series of sharpe at this rate
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:27,
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Our Aveline will get her share too though, remember(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:29,
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I liked sharpe when i was little, sometimes there were boobs(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:31,
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If Sean Bean went round your flat he'd die of embarrassment when he'd see your polished oak flooring(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:38,
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only cos he had to sell his to buy carling(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:43,
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i met an extremely nice and lush surveyor last night who lives in belsize parkpart of me thinks mmm, nice guy, hot, nice house. part of me thinks, hmmmmm, surveyors are generally dim hugos.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:39,
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Unless someone's beneficially dead he aint gonna have a house round there on surveyors wages(
Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:41,
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family money, innithe was practically sneezing it.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:42,
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Man, I hope that's catching(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:43,
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He's prime target acquisition then ent hebetter than some loud mouthed tosser in a pink shirt who slopes off to his bedsit in Leyton after his night of braggadocio
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Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:49,
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"so what first attracted you to millionaire Paul Daniels"best question Louis Theroux ever asked
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:52,
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Whereas he is thinking today 'what on earth was that I met last night? Some sort of lawyer? Pissed on vodka and only interested in my bank balance? Not going out there again'(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:43,
Reply)
it was a client event and i was totally sober, thank you!(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:44,
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Wait, so they're having a go at a 53 year old manfor not looking as good as he did 20 years ago?
Seems reasonable.
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Kroney, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:22,
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He did have his head cut off recently too(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:23,
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Looks pretty good, considering(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:25,
Reply)
Don't forget the time trampling cows pushed him off a cliff(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:27,
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and getting blown up by Pierce Brosnan, twice(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:29,
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IT WAS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY WHAT DID IT!(
Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:33,
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It'll teach him to buy Carling, the cheap cunt(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:42,
Reply)
I don't think that's quite what they are doing.It's not particularly fair to do what they are doing anyway though.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:24,
Reply)
They included a picture of him playing Sharpewhich was what, '94 or so?
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Kroney, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:26,
Reply)
take shot of celebrity looking rough/blinking as they leave a club etcextrapolate into "alcohol hell"
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:26,
Reply)
Yeah, that's what they are doing.Although, as you jokingly implied, the voice of experience in me suggests they are probably on to something.
Not that that makes it fair to splash it all over the papers.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:28,
Reply)
I saw him in the pub a coule of years ago and he looked rough thennot ina shambling alcoholic kind of way, just weather beaten. he has that sort of face.¬
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:30,
Reply)
You saw him a pub. Proof right there. The dirty drunk...But as I said, it really was the bandage more than anything else that made me think 'oh dear'.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:32,
Reply)
It looks like his little finger is missing(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:33,
Reply)
Swapped it for a bottle of vodka, I'd say.Did you never wonder why my typing was so bad?
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 31 May 2012, 11:46,
Reply)
sue's interviewing for a new telesales girl todayand malc and jon were getting all excited, hoping that we'd finally have a "fit" girl in the office, they were so excited by the idea they were practically bouncing around and wanking each other off.
Two girls have been interviewed so far, combined weight: easily 35 stone.
Poor Malc and John :'(
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 12:02, Reply)
good thinking man, i'll mention it to suei don't like sue anymore, she keeps implying that i'm ugly
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 12:08, Reply)
Fact of the dayAs of 1987 Debbie McGee has held the patent for the adhesive used in all name brand Sellotapes.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 31 May 2012, 12:09,
Reply)
2nd Fact of the DayApart from his ground breaking work in keeping Syrians safe, former UN Secretary General Kofi Annan is an avid stamp collector and has one of the largest collections in Europe.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 12:17, Reply)
I think you're trolling here Mr ApeThe patents (such as they were) would be long lapsed by now. As it is, Sellotape (domestic) is owned by Henkel and Sellotape (Industrial) is owned by Scapa.
(, Thu 31 May 2012, 12:17, Reply)
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