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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Afternoon drinking is an excellent pursuit, particularlr when safe in your garden, with kids, pets and bizarrely a hedgehog, which has just turned up. Recipes, anyone?
What is the grossest thing you have ever eaten? What are your views on afternoon boozing ?
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 14:57, 107 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
I'm off my fucking tits

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 15:07, Reply)
Good lad.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 15:21, Reply)
alright Mr B

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 15:38, Reply)
I like tits.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:11, Reply)
Uh daubing HSBC jcsbjejbc Juneau nests bade vw say On my way!
Gay water bdgdyv snook
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 15:26, Reply)
Cycling Ave.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 15:38, Reply)
Hello frog.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 15:43, Reply)
Alrugth

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:00, Reply)
Can't smell correcrly. Maybe dozer could lend you a dictionary?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:46, Reply)
tell you what, Doctir Beast Trowel, what aboyt i lind hym a camping fax stove?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:48, Reply)
Mayeb eh cin

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:49, Reply)
id rahter note

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:50, Reply)
Hedgehogs are such pricks.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:09, Reply)
why can't they just share the hedge?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:14, Reply)
Ourdoghas been pricked by it several times, and still insists on trying to play with it. I've stuck it under a bush, the hedgehog, not the dog.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:49, Reply)
If it's wandering about at this time of day it's probably an adolescent which has lost it's mother
The most responsible thing you can do is scoop it up and take it to a rescue centre.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:31, Reply)
Really? Thanks for the advice, just phoned someone now, they're going to collect it.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:20, Reply)
Wotchit!

(I helped save b3ta! edjogs Collared doves are shit., Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:08, Reply)
Afternoon
drinking is great
(I helped save b3ta! social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:19, Reply)
I'm in the pub
/ac

A drunken conversation means that Wednesday week I'm going to a tat auction; 50 quid spend, all stuff to be sold on eBay or local shops... Whoever gets the most profit out of their shite wins everyone else's profit. Hopefully I won't get thrown out for bidding like t-money.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 16:31, Reply)
I'm taking this as medical advice to have a gin in the garden

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:27, Reply)
I'd follow your instincts
Been gardening, listing to cricket and steadily drinking all afternoon.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:35, Reply)
In which case I recommend a joint to go with it

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:37, Reply)
Nothing in the house
Best part of a year since I had a joint, and I can't say I miss it.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:44, Reply)
I miss it then when I smoke I'm disappointed

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:58, Reply)
Shit weed maybe

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:58, Reply)
No - I'M Disappointed
And fuck you India. xxxx
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:01, Reply)
Your dead, you have no say here

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:03, Reply)
I'm channelling through Derek Acorah
And that lass with the jugs.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:05, Reply)
Okay, so the washing isn't dry and it has gone quite overcast.
Should I get the washing in or have a beer?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:52, Reply)
Do you really need to ask?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:57, Reply)
Sadly, yes.
I have no other point of reference.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:06, Reply)
Tell you what, have a beer while you decide

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:07, Reply)
Good plan.
Might as well as it's raining.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:10, Reply)
Have you considered growing a pair?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:58, Reply)
A pair of washing?
Or a pair of beer?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:59, Reply)
Beer
My A level geography suggests that dry adiabatic lapse rates are the dominant weather force. Good drying weather.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 17:59, Reply)
it's been drizzly here all day

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:00, Reply)
Wales^

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:03, Reply)
we've had at least 5 days of sumshine this year
I think that's summer done
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:06, Reply)
How are you Captain?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:07, Reply)
Should have asked that myself.
Long time no speak.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:08, Reply)
I'm not bad
I've got rabbits, yesterday and 3 more comedy gigs booked. Party tonight, too. Things are OK

How are both of you?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:16, Reply)
Rabbits, yesterday
Not a good condition. A bit of germolene might sort it.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:19, Reply)
I'm told the thing to get rid of rabbits
is to feed them toasties with as many different fillings as possible.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:22, Reply)
wah wah waaaahhh

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:23, Reply)
Fuck off Jeff.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:23, Reply)
Put the mixed toasties in punchline
It works best as a one-liner.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:24, Reply)
No, it's more amusing to let people insert their own punchline
then they have to endure the self loathing of realising they already knew such a crap joke.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:27, Reply)
You've changed.
What happened to the pigs?

And these comedy gigs, audience or performer?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:21, Reply)
Just say she's done something with her hair Jeff.
Always the safest option.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:22, Reply)
still got pigs, they're ace,too
performer...also been in the audience for quite a few, research, dontcha know?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:23, Reply)
Maybe you could star in swipe's sitcom

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:24, Reply)
My local are thinking of doing a regular comedy night.
Are you funny?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:24, Reply)
apparently - people laugh
and I've got good feedback from other comedians (wheeeeeeeeeeee)

If they're doing 5 minute slots, find out who runs it and I'll try and get on there
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:26, Reply)
Haven't started yet, just been asked if
1. We know any people who might be up for doing it
2. If we thought a comedy night would work.

Describe you style.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:28, Reply)
messaged

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:31, Reply)
Hats off Cavy.
You're more of a man than most of b3ta will ever be.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:29, Reply)
i'm better than that, I'm woman
anyway, it's all fun
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:32, Reply)
More power to you getting up there. That's the worst part.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:59, Reply)
nah, writing it was the nervewracking part
I can write, but knowing you have to write to make people laugh and laugh frequently is scary
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:03, Reply)
I just had my hair cut. They gave me beer.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:57, Reply)
That's one hell of an incentive.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:58, Reply)
Free shoulder massage too! The beer was served on a plate with fruit which was a bit weird. I left the fruit.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:01, Reply)
are you in a brothel?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:02, Reply)
It wouldn't be my kind of brothel to be honest, too many of those 'gays' and Chinese', but only one 'tranny'

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:04, Reply)
So, in a nutshell, you've just been sheared and massaged by a poofter?

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:06, Reply)
and probably roofied

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:06, Reply)
He washed my hair too, but I could tell he wanted more.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:07, Reply)
I just wanted more beer.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:08, Reply)
Did he offer you something for the weekend?
Like AIDS.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:08, Reply)
No, don't be daft. He will laugh at that when I meet him for a drink later.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:10, Reply)
Proper etiquette would be not to offer that, more an unwanted gift.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:10, Reply)
It's all go in the south! You crazy folk!

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:03, Reply)
It's these London pricks jase, in kent it cost me 9 quid and takes 10 minutes. This took an hour, still, not much else going on today.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:05, Reply)
I cut my own hair, because I can. Kent massive .

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:14, Reply)
Alright bear Pookie

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:14, Reply)
Get a new phone or not in the end?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:17, Reply)
Nah, wait until September and save the £90 early upgrade charge.
Plus the bird in there confused me with the tariffs so I ran away.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:18, Reply)
Those tariffs can be right tricky cunts.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:21, Reply)
Also I wasn't really listening as I was thinking about a bacon sarnie

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:23, Reply)
I get mine at Christmas ish so am gonna wait for that too.
2 year tariffs are bastards and no mistake. especially when there's a COOL NEW PHONE every few months
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:32, Reply)
Yer me too cos am old and bald

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:17, Reply)
^ba... oh

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:19, Reply)
+ fat
+ queer

Ha ha memes!
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:19, Reply)
Ive got some Spiced Lams and Dr Pepper on the go.
Got some tunes on the go before I go to my better halfs for a bit smoke and some films. Canny.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 18:58, Reply)
PIZZA or KEBAB?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:20, Reply)
CURRY

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:21, Reply)
Go to Iceland and get a frozen Doner Kebab pizza.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:21, Reply)
Put one on the other

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:21, Reply)
I reckon it'd be quite tricky to balance a pizza on a kebab

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:23, Reply)
Don't be ridiculous
You'd roll it like a cigar first.

Blimey Tangs, do I have to think of everything?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:35, Reply)
WELL YOURE ALL NO HELP

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:22, Reply)
You didn't say you needed help

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:23, Reply)
Do you really expect me to make my own decisions?

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:24, Reply)
Get a kebab.
Shaved elephant leg is what you need.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:25, Reply)
Thank you

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:28, Reply)
Not at all, but it wasn't clear that that was the purpose of your post

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:25, Reply)
kebab. and a small pizza

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:30, Reply)
^fat

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:33, Reply)
I just shut my head in a door :(

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:21, Reply)
You bent spastic.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:22, Reply)
oven?

(katie hopkins telling it where its at, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 19:42, Reply)
glans?

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 12 Jul 2014, 21:09, Reply)

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