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# I've always been impressed by your bedside manner
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:47, archived)
# I'd be nicer if he had cancer
As far as I know he doesn't have cancer though.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:47, archived)
# Hmm
Only cancer though? How about AIDS, or SARS or Cabbage Flavoured Wee, or whatever superbug is currently frollicking in the hospitals of Blighty?
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:49, archived)
# Dunno, wouldn't catch me near a hospital, they smell of death.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:51, archived)
# Death and disinfectant
Unlike GPs which smell of old people with nothing better to do than go to their doctor for a nice chat about the weather and I think I might have bunions my friend Mavis said she had bunions and she was telling me what they were like and I was thinking you know I might have something similar because it all seemed quite familiar and I know you remember a few years ago I came in, it was a beautiful day, beautiful weather...
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:53, archived)
# Yeah, you kind of lose your sense of smell after a while or at least become immune to people who don't wash.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:56, archived)
# Oh, your practice is in Glasgow then?
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:59, archived)
# And then you stop washing yourself and don't notice because you've lost your sense of smell
and then people start shouting WURZEL at you in the streets and you start drinking meths and your nights are filled with retching and throwing up strings of bile into filthy shit-filled sewers and in the morning your head pounds and the weak sun rams needles into your eyes and there's nothing to drink but lighter fluid for two hours til the shops open and then you stumble into work and two hours of talk talk talk and you don't fucking care about Mavis' fucking bunions and talk talk talk talk talk talk and you realise you're talking to yourself and pounding with the paperweight on your desk and her face has caved in and it's lucky your trousers are already red with your own blood but someone is hammering on the door and asking if you're alright and you look at the letter opener and you remember enough to know where your jugular is and you raise it to your throat
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 17:03, archived)
# This is just beautiful.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 18:54, archived)
# Thank you
I pour my heart into my writing
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 20:11, archived)
# I might have cat AIDS, I haven't checked.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:52, archived)
# You should get that checked
Too many filthy yiffers are contracting cat AIDS these days :(
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:55, archived)
# Hey, it might be GOOD cat AIDS from having a blood transfusion from a cat.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:57, archived)
# Actually that's a good point
It's not nice of me to immediately assume it was bad AIDS from bumseks with a kitty
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:58, archived)
# bumseks with a kitty, not my bag, I shared some notes with a coke head siamese.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 17:02, archived)
# Ah fuck it, no cancer sorry, and yeah I am a bit of a mong, it is a pdf, any good suggestions for sharin it would be appreciated.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:51, archived)
# What am I, your fileshare advice giving bitch?
Try dropbox
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:55, archived)
# I think I love you.
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 16:58, archived)
#
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 17:37, archived)
# :D Hahaha!
(, Wed 17 Oct 2012, 18:40, archived)