The fast-getaway merchants know nothing about the true ways of burglary.
(
Captain Howdy,
Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:36,
archived)
I heard an argument in the bathroom. I shot through the door, thinking it was a burglar raping my girlfriend who was asleep in my bed......uh...no...she was in the bathroom screaming at me to get my gun and shoot through the door, after I already shot through the door....I thought she was asleep, but I woke up because I need a fan, when I got the fan she got mugged by a burglar and locked in the bathroom. "I'll save you, Dear!"...I got a cricket bat...I killed you and now I will save you...I mean the burglar killed her and vanished after I shot through the door...They had an argument about hiding in bathrooms. Good thing I had my gun. I'm innocent.............and not guilty at all.................. since it was all a mistake...and all.....I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL!!!
(
atomic A-bomb-a-nation,
Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:49,
archived)
He doesn't have a leg to -Ah fuck it, you can fill in the rest.
(
Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...",
Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:50,
archived)
A burglar took them and VANISHED.VANISHED...like he wasn't there AT ALL.
( atomic A-bomb-a-nation,
Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:00,
archived)
I'm waiting for it to get desperate, and for the defence to rely on tales about the trauma of lost limbs and/or the particular side effects of the prescription medicine he might have been taking.
(
Captain Howdy,
Tue 19 Feb 2013, 18:59,
archived)
Won't be long now... Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...",
Tue 19 Feb 2013, 19:00,
archived)