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[challenge entry] 'I'm innocent - someone must've spiked the boar!'

From the Paris 2024 Olympics challenge. See all 40 entries (closed)

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Pizopop was here, Thu 1 Aug 2024, 22:46, archived)
# ha
I've heard Oblelix has appealed
(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 1 Aug 2024, 23:20, archived)
# Cacofonix is bard
(Astatine, Fri 2 Aug 2024, 20:58, archived)
# ACTUALLY
The story (set in 50BC) made it quite clear that artificial stimulants, in particular the Magic Potion, were strictly prohibited, and as such Obelix wasn't allowed to compete. The Romans, however, DID take the Potion, were found out and disqualified. Thus, Asterix won the 24-Stadia race fair and square. Le Monde is full of shit and should apologize.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Fri 2 Aug 2024, 0:01, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Fri 2 Aug 2024, 11:02, archived)
# Mr Pedantic!
(plankton, Fri 2 Aug 2024, 23:10, archived)
# heheh
(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Fri 2 Aug 2024, 11:02, archived)
# most excellent
(I helped save b3ta! PooPants, Sun 4 Aug 2024, 15:25, archived)