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# Dear Mrs. Smith,
I'm sorry to have to inform you that your son was killed in action on Tuesday. He died a heroes death.

Yours sincerely,

General Quentin Watt.

P.S. I am wanking as I write this.
(I helped save b3ta! GR33DY, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:00, archived)
# Dear Mr Jones
I am sorry to say that your recent application for the position of Accountant has been unsuccessful. As you can imagine, there was a great amount of interest in this job, so a lot of people unfortunately had to be disappointed.

We would of course appreciate hearing from you should another position arise.

Yours sincerely,
Ed Morrish
HR Director,
Morrish, Brown and Wightman.

PS I am wanking as I write this.
(martian, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:05, archived)
# This is the funniest thread I have ever seen
FACT!
(I helped save b3ta! lemonhead, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:06, archived)
# Today's Special
Pan-Roasted Sea Bass and Ginger

P.S. I'm wanking as I write this
(I helped save b3ta! lemonhead, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:11, archived)
# Spooks
The new series. Starts June 9th on BBC1.
MI5, not 9 to 5.

PS I am Wanking as I write this.
(martian, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:13, archived)
# seconded
(I helped save b3ta! Reverend Dan, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:11, archived)
# yes, yes, yes.
(I helped save b3ta! GR33DY, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:07, archived)
# Dear Mrs Peters
You will be pleased to know that we are able start your fertility treatment as soon as a suitable donor is available.

Dr Boris
London Fertility Clinic

PS I am wanking as i write this
(I helped save b3ta! Spoon, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:14, archived)
# Dear Mr Ince
You might already have won £10,000! Yes, *you*, Mr Ince, have been entered into a SPECIAL PRIZE DRAW where you might have won a CASH PRIZE £10,000, £1,000, or £100! To claim your prize call this number and quote the reference "NH4TT2".

0820 90 50 70

Ian Jackson,
Prize Draw Co-Ordinator
Millennium Awards Inc.

PS I am wanking as I write this.
(martian, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:18, archived)
# 2 extra pints and a loaf please
Thanks!
No 42

P.S. I'm wanking as I write this
(I helped save b3ta! lemonhead, Thu 29 May 2003, 14:20, archived)
# ........and as I
look back on my sexual adventures in holland, they are with great memories


P.S. I'm wanking as I write this
(I helped save b3ta! Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Thu 29 May 2003, 15:54, archived)