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# I have no idea who Bod is
which implies youngnessness

tho i do remember body blows hence oldnessness

does that make me middle aged?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:43, archived)
# Mabye...
Olung or yould.....
or middle aged, whichever you prefer :P
Good Morrow, douth the morning see you well?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:48, archived)
# yould

yeah, only working today then taking the rest of the week off, huzzah!

hows abooot yoos?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:49, archived)
# Yowzers!
What luck we have, for I am also off this week :D
That means I should be spending the day looking after my dog but I'll probably just stay here...
hope she doesn't die......
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:52, archived)
# woohoo!
im sure she wont...

any big plans? yesterday i copied 80gb of films off my mate and im going to get very stoned at watch them... all.
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:55, archived)
# heehee good plan
Nope, nothing special
May be going to an U18 rugger match on Sat, but then again, mabye not
My friends all buggered off today to see Shaun of the Dead and abandoned me, the gits...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:57, archived)
# I thought Shaun of the Dead was a joke.
Then people here started talking about going to the cinemas and seeing it, and i realised then that the film actually existed.
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:59, archived)
# some of mine did
but hopefully still enough left who havent so i dont have to go on my own, which would be very sad indeed.....

ooh its lunchtime, back on in a bit
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:00, archived)
# That reminds me i'm hungry, very!
Back soon to :)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:01, archived)
# I'll probably
have to wait yonks for the video :(

Enjoy yer food!
edit: and probably fags :P
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:04, archived)
# nope
all out, and funnily enough they dont tend to sell them in hospitals!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:12, archived)
# Ah
Yes, good point :S
Enjoy your hospital food?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:13, archived)
# eating a not especially nice
bacon sandwich at the moment... its bad even for staff
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:14, archived)
# Mmmmm, lovely..
I've never had a bacon sandwich before :(
Shows how much I've lived....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:19, archived)
# vegetarian? jewish?
jewish vegetarian?

usually i would recommned it, but this one....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:21, archived)
# Nope, neither
I just never had one...
Probably my dogs fault for looking so cute when I'm about to eat my dinner so I end up giving half of it to her...
Hairy basturd....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:28, archived)
# gah!
there is a man drilling something into the ceiling in the office... i hate the sound of drills

and he is disturbing my ermmmm, i want to say work, but that doesnt sound right
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:31, archived)
# Heehee
enjoying your ermmmmmmm before the Satanic Driller arrived?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:35, archived)
# fecking hell!
its a CCTV camera he is installing... and its right above my desk!!! do you think they are onto me????
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:40, archived)
# Lets see...
Has the box containing a ringing phone arrived yet?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:41, archived)
# it hasnt.... yet
this is a worrying development, i hope my boss isnt sat at home watching me over a webcam or something
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:44, archived)
# That would be worrying for several reasons...
wink wink, nudge nudge...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:46, archived)
# ewwww
that would be sooooo nasty

*tells myself it cant be true*
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:50, archived)
# You can't be too sure these days.....
I take it your boss is in no way desireable?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:51, archived)
# well of two bosses...
one is a middleaged woman, who, really really really isnt

the other is a bloke with crosseyes in a wheelchair...

so neither really floats my boat, to be honest
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:53, archived)
# heehee
sorry, the second one shouldn't be funny but it was in my head...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:55, archived)
# yeah, its wrong
but its right

he is a really nice bloke, hell he is letting me have 3 days off!

but there is a distinct lack of talent in this department...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:57, archived)
# Awww, im sure thats not true
I mean, you must get a lotta work out of people who go on b3ta all day!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:59, archived)
# most people actually seem to work!
except me, of course
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:00, archived)
# Meh,
why work when others are fully able to do your job for you?
That really shouldn't be how I live my life, but it is ;D
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:03, archived)
# exactly!
they all seem to enjoy it, so if i did it they would be get bored, so by not doing it im helping them

im sure they all hate me
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:06, archived)
# No,no,no
Im sure they all love you for releiving them of their boredom while you cease yours on b3ta ;)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:07, archived)
# ahh yeah b3ta
it really does make the days at work go faster...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:09, archived)
# *sigh*
Ah feck, this nail varnish is ment to make your nails whiter but i look like i havd a calcium deficiency!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:14, archived)
# heh, that must be real good stuff you got there!
I once fell asleep(passed out) at the reading festival and my girlfriend at the time painted my nails purple...

oooh girl with the tash has just offered to go to the shops, mmmm lovely fags
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:17, archived)
# hahaha!
How cruel on both counts! What a lovely nickname she has, but if she doesn't do anything about it then i suppose she had it coming...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:21, archived)
# she is seriously hairy
and her actual name is Tasha as well, which just makes it 10 times funnier that she has a tash
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:22, archived)
# heehee
Ahhh, isn't irony cruel?
A girl at my school had a tash and she was really slow. It took her like 1 minute to get out a sentence
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:26, archived)
# its a sad thing to see
my last ex has just started this whole "natural" look, she has dreads and doesnt seem to shave anything anymore.

Saying that, i have grown a beard at the moment cos my shaver broke and i cant be arsed to get another one
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:29, archived)
# I remember when I went
through what I like to call "The Jesus Phase" where I instantly found any man with long hair and a beard very attractive.....

Blaaaaargh, that hairy woman program springs to mind again....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:32, archived)
# well i currently have an upside down head
clean shaven head with a beard, its, shall we say, different

again, im glad i didnt see it, but i think this girl could have been on it!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:33, archived)
# There's a man
that wanders round here who is bald and bearded, but his head is covered in tattoos....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:36, archived)
# could be me very soon
except the tattoos

i think i now have to offer hairy girl a fag, as she did ask me for one earlier and now she has walked all the way to the shops to get me some...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:37, archived)
# Ahhhh, bless...
Hope she doesn't singe her tash on it....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:39, archived)
# pffft
thats the image of the day, right there

im gonna be laughing all the time she is smoking it
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:40, archived)
# She'll probably say
"Whats so funny? Is my hair messed up?"

or mabye not.....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:43, archived)
# ..on your head it fine
then duck very quickly
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:46, archived)
# heehee
You never know, she could have a teratoma in her face.....

eww eww eww, bad mental image..
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:47, archived)
# its a day of bad mental images
apparantly the tash girl is going to uni to study law, guess she must be brigther than she sounds*

*not very bright
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 13:57, archived)
# heehee, charming :)
So she's abandoning a life of fetching fags and humerous nicknames to become a lawyer and be filthy rich?
Is she crazy?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:00, archived)
# honestly, she sounds like a total chav(ette?)
must be crazy, who would want to leave the NHS?

(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:04, archived)
# Chavette eeeey?
Far too many round here. You can't go outside without hearing at least on "Wat da Fook!"

Awwww, you can work with me,
ie, unemployed and sitting on arse all day...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:09, archived)
# chavs are a universal occurance i guess
sitting on my arse? im an expert at that!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:11, archived)
# Excellent! You're hired!
You can start.......now ;)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:15, archived)
# is this a paid
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:15, archived)
# Well...
you'll get free tea and digestives or chicken noodle cuppa soup :P
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:20, archived)
# ooooooh
the pay maybe lower, but the benefits sound better!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:22, archived)
# And no tashy girl either ;)
*pushes over wheely chair*
Well then,get to work! The messages wont post themselves!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:24, archived)
# aha
a wheely chair, i have one of those here, and its great cos the floor is so slidey.

You can push yourself for miles.

I wonder what would happen if the posts did post themselves?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:27, archived)
# WoOoOo
that would be handy, but very very weird..

heehee, i love slidey chairs...
Once me and my mate Debbie got really bored and I pushed he round on one 100 times. She got up, stumbled into a metal table, fell and farted (not very plesant) and then the table fell on top of her...
Much hilarity was had...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:30, archived)
# crazyness
i used to love spinning round on chairs when i was a kid, then i would do it too much and make myself sick

a harsh way to learn the lesson (without farting)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:32, archived)
# heh
needless to say, any future boyfriends were informed of this insident..

I used to do it too, but then I stopped for a few years and when I tried again I got a rather bad headache and had to lie down....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:35, archived)
# farting or spining in chairs?
both fun im sure...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:37, archived)
# Spinning chairs of course!
I don't fart, i'm a lady, I do lady things like smelling flowers and petting kittens...*

*may be lies....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:41, archived)
# oh yes of course
i forgot that...:-P

and your friend is just a freak example of women farting then?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:44, archived)
# Yup, that and
she's the one that bogged off with her unibrowed on/off bf to see Shaun of the Dead without me :(

(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:48, archived)
# obviously not a lady then
my mate matt has a unibrow, he used to be very sensitive about it, but he has got over it now

an ex of his had electrolosis (?) on her eyebrows to remove her monobrow... but between them they had a pair!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:51, archived)
# hahaha!
Ahhh, unibrows never cease to amuse me...

This lad is very unfortunate though as he looks, has the brain power of and is built like a neanderthal*

*i canne spell :s
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:55, archived)
# that looks correct to me, cos i cant either
im sure he makes up for it in other areas...maybe
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:56, archived)
# *shudder*
that's verrrrrrry disturbing..
ARSE, I just stapeled my finger!! Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow, stupid novelty stapler looking so innocent...........
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:58, archived)
# pfffft
how the hell did you manage that? did it sneak up on you?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 14:59, archived)
# I was fiddleing with it
and it slipped and stapled the middle of my finger :( Bloody hurts....
I know someone who stapled the webby bit of his hand, his leg and his fingers...
He's a weird basturd....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:03, archived)
# awww for you
and ewww for your weirdo friend
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:04, archived)
# Blargh,
he's not really a friend, he's my sister's ginger friend's bf who asked me out....
It's rather confusing...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:06, archived)
# yes that is rather confusing
lol, why do you feel the need to refer to her as "you sisters ginger friend" have you seen my profile :-P
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:08, archived)
# Er............
Well, um..., to me she has no name as she is the most annoying person on the planet and she just happens to be ginger (such a nice colour)........

*phew*, saved.....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:10, archived)
# mmmhmmm
you managed to dig up quite successfully there.

Like my friend matt (again) he was looking through pictures on my phone and someone had taken a picture of my recently shaved head, and he asked me why someone had taken a picture of a balloon.

"Err, well matt, thats my head"
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:12, archived)
# hahahahahahaha!!
the loon!
That made my tea get all over my newly bandaged finger..
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:14, archived)
# yeah... he spent about an hour
down the pub trying to get himself out of it. It was just very funny, tho i wasnt going to let him know that

you really did some damage with that stapler then?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:17, archived)
# I think
I think i did a lot of damage but it didn't do that much.
I now have a hole in the middle of my finger which is rather deep...
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:21, archived)
# ouch
cant say thats something i have ever done

a friend of mine once took most of his finger off with a knife when chopping up potatoes... not nice apparantly
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:27, archived)
# Yeouch
If he had, and served it for some reason, I doubt the person who found it would have been happy..
I've never really done any serious damage to myself, thought I sprained my wrist once and had to use a bloody granny trolley as a schoolbag...
not the most fun 3 weeks....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:33, archived)
# pfft
granny trolley

would have been some lovely spuds, little bit more meaty.

God its funny listening to the helpdesk calls, people really are stupid
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:35, archived)
# I got sick of it
and threw it down some stairs..
Needless to say, the teacher there was none too pleased...
Helpdesk calls eeeey? What kind of things have they done?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:38, archived)
# oh, just people who cant find a Z key (for example)
and just as i typed that someone was asking whether they could plug a mouse into their PC.... umm, i fairly certain you CAN!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:42, archived)
# Ahahahahaha!
Stupid people are funny.....
Speaking of which, have you ever read those Darwin Award books?
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:46, archived)
# i have had a flick fhrough then website of them
but not entire books, no
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:48, archived)
# I read one
and found it rather amusing which I know I shouldn't have because, well, people died, but I can't help them being stupid!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:55, archived)
# argh hairy girl is being really friendly
i dont likes it i tell ya
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 15:59, archived)
# May I just say
Ahhh, takes me back to primary school.....
Mabye she thinks you're one of those hair fetish blokes.....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:02, archived)
# you may :-P
god i havent done any work at all today, not one thing

i might go early, not really much point me being here!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:04, archived)
# Heehee
Not working is always a good plan and leaving/sneeking out is even better
Awww, but tashy might miss you ;P
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:09, archived)
# maybe...
tho i think* that she is engaged

(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:12, archived)
# Hmmm...
mabye there was a number to call on that hairy woman programme...
She may like to play outside the field though..... ;)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:15, archived)
# she might like to
but.... no way... noooo way

i would have to be REALLLY drunk.

REALLY REALLY REALLY, actually i should have more self belief. NEVER!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:18, archived)
# Awww, poor lady
Im sure she'll be heart broken.....
Blergh, If you snogged your beard might get caught....
eww eww eww eww
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:20, archived)
# im sure she is just being nice
still she has someone, so im sure she cant complain!

eww eww eww eww, thats just wrong
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:21, archived)
# Im ashamed
of myself for thinking it *shudder*
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:25, archived)
# longest thread
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:28, archived)
# Methinks
quite possibley :D
Wonder if there's a prize to be had....
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:30, archived)
# started at 11.30!!!
I dont really think the layout of b3ta is designed for threads this long
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:34, archived)
# Woooooooooah,
If it ain't, it should be, just for the likes of us :)
edit: bugger, you really havent done any work! Well done!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:39, archived)
# definitly
ooh hairy girl is speaking to a guy who used to be her teacher... thats weird

apparantly she is engaged and now "to commited" to flirt anymore. Odd odd stuff. I might go soon
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:43, archived)
# Go and
stop him stealing your woman? ;)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:46, archived)
# NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
and fuck it its 10 mins early, but i dont care!

well, always a pleasure to break b3ta thread records with ya.

Byeeeeeeeee :)
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:48, archived)
# Likewise :)
Sneek out safely and don't get caught by tashed ladies!
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 16:51, archived)
# 80 Gb!!!!!
Even if they are high quality, you'll have to set aside a week or so to watch that lot :P
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:57, archived)
# div x quality
so yeah, im probably being a bit ambitious
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 11:59, archived)
# You might want to book a holiday or something hehe
You could have a themed film watching day. Just watch horror films maybe.
(, Tue 13 Apr 2004, 12:00, archived)