
crabs are the spawn of pan and satan. Do you enjoy seeing snakes wield cookware? Like fuck you do.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:31,
archived)

After Sgt Wilson did something to irritate him.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:35,
archived)

Ever.
EDIT: Oh you stealth editor. Like Rupert Murdoch coated in radar absorbing lubricant.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:37,
archived)
EDIT: Oh you stealth editor. Like Rupert Murdoch coated in radar absorbing lubricant.

No, wait... Something wrong there... Don't panic...
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:40,
archived)

Listen very carefully...I will say this, only VANCE.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:41,
archived)

in Pirates of the Carribbean III am the bestest.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:35,
archived)

I got superglue in mine once, but that was only because the doctor managed to dribble it in (she was gluing my eyebrow shut)
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:41,
archived)

Not a particularly well-prepared thief?
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:42,
archived)

The same doctor who poked me in the other eye when doing all this gluing, and then accused me of being drunk.
Even if I was when I came in love, that was hours ago.
(And I wasn't)
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:43,
archived)
Even if I was when I came in love, that was hours ago.
(And I wasn't)

Because a cunt punched me in the face for being in the same place as him and the force sort of burst the skin on my eyebrow.
It's why I've got this great, blazin' squad-esque scar. That people think I did on purpose.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:45,
archived)
It's why I've got this great, blazin' squad-esque scar. That people think I did on purpose.

And no crack in my ocular socket. And no pain when I look left (the only pain that won't go away).
But can't complain, he went to prison.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:49,
archived)
But can't complain, he went to prison.

I have a restraining order so if he comes near me it's straight back inside.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:59,
archived)

at a holiday camp. All the staff caught crabs - they were rife in the bedding.
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:41,
archived)

'Cos they actually look like they were made out of a frozen mousse pot and some pipe cleaners.
Creationism FTW.
But by a God who watched too much Blue Peter.
(Presumably the Platypus was from a short period when his mum wasn't around and he switched to ITV).
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:43,
archived)
Creationism FTW.
But by a God who watched too much Blue Peter.
(Presumably the Platypus was from a short period when his mum wasn't around and he switched to ITV).

"It's called 'Your Mother Wouldn't Like It'.
"You're right. She doesn't"
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:49,
archived)
"You're right. She doesn't"

that listed "% of people who watch ITV" as one of the descriptions of the area?
Made me smirk...
( ,
Fri 15 Jun 2007, 17:52,
archived)
Made me smirk...