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# couldn't sort anything out
it's all meant to cut off at midnight tomorrow.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:08, archived)
# NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
/Vader/Luke.

Hurry back!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:10, archived)
# i'll do my best
unfortunately, i can't see me being able to get back on in less than a year :(
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:12, archived)
# What are you having cut off at midnight tomorrow? O_o
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:12, archived)
# my internet, phone and cable
i is poverty-stricken :(
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:16, archived)
# oh noes! That's crap.
You should send me written posts and I will scan them and post them on your behalf. I promise to wear a girly wig while I do it though.

Don't worry lovely, when you get back, fuck all will have changed around here ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:18, archived)
# that is trues
(I helped save b3ta! Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:21, archived)
# it is crap
but i have to be sensible about it. i can't get a job for quite some time yet, i've got bills to pay, food to buy and not enough money for luxuries. hopefully, i may be back when the weather picks up, as i won't have to spend £15-20 a week on gas
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:21, archived)
# There's more important things than silly b3ta.
There I said it, everyone.

DO YOUR WORST YOU SLANTY-EYED FIENDS
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:23, archived)
# Shut up I'm trying to watch Top Gear!!!



(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:25, archived)
# *pulls out plug and stands in front of telly with arms folded*
Darling, we need to talk.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:26, archived)
# I am so glad you didn't use the word 'naked' in that sentence!!!
;P
(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:28, archived)
# That's implied.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:29, archived)
# Thought so.



(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:30, archived)
# You are now thinking about me naked.
Progress
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:31, archived)
# Only in sillouette becuse the telly is on....
Damn...you unplugged it.....
*runs to wife*
"Darling make me not feel gay"....."Ok love, shag me hard"...."up the arse"......
D'OH!!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:34, archived)
# oh the dilemma :D
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:37, archived)
# Oh the fucking chance!!!




(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:40, archived)
# See, you straight lads all love the arse.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:42, archived)
# Someone else's
Someone else's which is female.
(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:43, archived)
# That's implied as well
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:43, archived)
# :D haha
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:31, archived)
# boris' lap is bloody funny
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:27, archived)
# I may watch it later on iplayer
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:28, archived)
# i watched it on sunday
my telly has just turned over to e4, which means earl is on.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:30, archived)
# I dont know this Earl of which you speak
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:32, archived)
# my name is earl
great show!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:35, archived)
# oh noes!
can't you get interwebs on your (moble) telefonieoes?
(I helped save b3ta! SkUG >_O i got a couple of stitches in my eyeball... ow, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:17, archived)
# i haven't even got a camera on my phone! :)
it's a tacky old piece of shit that my 62-year-old dad didn't want anymore. hell, as long as i can phone people with it, i don't care!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:23, archived)
# I wonder if you can claim on your house insurance?
"hello house insurance people, i seem to have lost my internet, can you send me a new one?"
(I helped save b3ta! SkUG >_O i got a couple of stitches in my eyeball... ow, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:24, archived)
# pfff
if only! my insurance is great, it's really cheap because i'm a council tenant(pauper), only £1.79 a week. i'm insured for £9k, which is a lot more than all my shit is worth!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:29, archived)
# Don't you have any good friends who will break into your house as a favour?
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:30, archived)
# no
i had a broken kitchen window for 6 years. it was double-glazed and some little shit had thrown a stone at it and smashed the outer pane. the police wouldn't give me a crime number* to get it fixed free and i couldn't afford to pay for it. i asked my mate to shoot it out with his air rifle, but he refused.
we're not friends any more.

*his mum said he was watching emmerdale with her at the time, lying bitch.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:33, archived)
# :(
Everyone needs friends who are there for you in times of insurance fraud plans.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:35, archived)
# too true
my mate crashed his car recently, he told me to say i was in the car with him, so i could claim for whiplash. i couldn't do it because
a) there's no way i could bring myself to lie in court
b) i was in bingo with about a thousand witnesses.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:38, archived)
# ahhh lying in court is another matter
I'm a good boy, I am.
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:41, archived)
# indeed it is
i've had a few friends ask me to lie in court. my ex asked when he was trying to claim for injuries, despite the fact that medical evidence showed quite clearly that he was lying. my mate asked me to lie when she attacked her fella, despite the fact that, once again, medical evidence proved she was lying.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:45, archived)
# yeah, you can only get away with perjury if you are an mp
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 20:00, archived)
# pfff
i just couldn't do it. it's not that i'm incapable of lying, it's just that i refuse to break my word. if i swear an oath to tell the truth, i'll tell the truth no matter what.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 20:04, archived)
# :(
discomeats sad
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:27, archived)
# me too :(
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 10 Dec 2008, 19:31, archived)