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# hahahahahaha!
tj: i just got sent this on a dating site...

Good Evening,
how are you?
Please forgive me if this is not your scene at all, but do you enjoy playing with unusual and exotic yet deliciously tactile items?
I have a suggestion you might find arousing...would you like to hear? Even if its only to laugh at it?
Ps. you have a wonderful womanly effulgence about you... :)


how the cunting fuck do i reply to that, any idea?
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:25, archived)
# do you effulge?
i'd take that.
(I helped save b3ta! the idiot Did I say it was funny?, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:28, archived)
# like a radiator!
haha.
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:28, archived)
# blimey!
there's your answer.
(I helped save b3ta! the idiot Did I say it was funny?, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:30, archived)
# hahaha,
i have the giggles for no reason at all.
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:30, archived)
# that's your wonderful womanly effulgence surfacing.
(I helped save b3ta! the idiot Did I say it was funny?, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:31, archived)
# hahaha. it's just so creepily tacted on to the end of it. it's wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:32, archived)
# my favourite tacked on note
aside from any p.s. is a note my my friend tacked on to a banal letter he was asked to deliver to a third party about meeting times. He simply added p.s. i like your breasts.

It still destroys me on a daily basis. I mentally append this to pretty much every note I write.
(I helped save b3ta! the idiot Did I say it was funny?, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:36, archived)
# just say
if it's anything to do with ramming a greased papaya up your mimsy, you're not interested.
finish with fuck off, you perv.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:28, archived)
# "How long is yours?"
if you want a no nosense reply
(I helped save b3ta! Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:29, archived)
# hahah i'm so tempted to ask.
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:30, archived)
# Dear Redsushi,
Firstly, many kind thanks for this striking message you have bestowed upon me. It gives me great pleasure to report that I, too, have a love for the exotic yet deliciously tactile items. Put stuff in me.

Sincerely yours, Amy.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:30, archived)
# hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:31, archived)
# It's your first encounter - it's best to be formal about it.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:33, archived)
# don't want to give it away all up front.
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:34, archived)
# Haha!!
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:36, archived)
# Dude, real names on internet = not cool.
Maybe you should read the FAQ?
(I helped save b3ta! JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:41, archived)
# my name's really olive..but sssh
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:42, archived)
# looking for your Popeye ?
/grabs a can of spinach
(I helped save b3ta! Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:43, archived)
# more on the buses than popeye
(I helped save b3ta! KittyVomit more super than a can of Tennants, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:44, archived)
# Fuck off, Jack.
Fuuuuuck.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:42, archived)
# Oh man this is terrible business.
(I helped save b3ta! JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:45, archived)
# Lets not fight. It's upsetting me, man.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:47, archived)
# Plus like 50% of b3ta's membership is named Dave
(I helped save b3ta! AgentMuu hentai coordination, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 2:09, archived)
# Tell him that you're a big fan of Lorena Bobbitt...
(I helped save b3ta! BargeArse Maker of fine Trouser Trumpets since 1863, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:35, archived)
# Ask him about it.
If you're definately not interested, lead him on because we always like to read the crazy bizarre emails of a sexual nature.
(I helped save b3ta! ClanSoul, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 1:42, archived)
# reply thus
"In how many different geographical locations will forensics find my [insert favorite genetalia here]?"
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Wed 15 Jul 2009, 2:35, archived)