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# Things I think Mormons carry in their backpacks:
Golf
Various guises, including ¬
- Slavic Grandmother
- Wolf
- Yatch
A small folk-art image of a house
A book on grooming horses
Sandwiches (various)
Pestilence.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 13:58, archived)
# what about spare ties?
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 13:59, archived)
# Kebab, hello.
Hello mate. Hi there, buddy. Hey! Hellotes, Kebab.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:01, archived)
# hellote.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:07, archived)
# MORE TIES THAN GOD
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:02, archived)
# UNCOUNTABLY MANY TIES
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:08, archived)
# You forgot fancy shoes.
Also beliefs which contradict both the bible and logic.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:00, archived)
# Yeah, admittedly it was a shabby list. All I could think of were dead animals and bottled hatred.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:00, archived)
# I wish you could really bottle hatred.
Or have a nice cup of RAAAGEEE.

The closest thing I can think to either of these is malt vinegar, which is like someone distilled satan's frustration and bottled it.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:03, archived)
# Perfect to put on your Chips of the Damned.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:04, archived)
# I'm fairly sure that if you hurled a bottle of Sarson's vinegar at a christian's face it would hurt them.
Proof that it is evil distillate!
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:07, archived)
# Actual real proof.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:20, archived)
# we would also have accepted: smaller backpacks, a necklace of mammoth tusks and a small family of edible dormice
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:05, archived)
# Your ideas are better too. I'm crap at thoughts.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:06, archived)
# Do the smaller backpacks
have even smaller backpacks in them?
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:07, archived)
# don't be silly. They contain tupperware, which in turn contain smaller tupperware
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:10, archived)
# Does the smaller tupperware contain
tiny necklaces of mammoth tusks and tiny dormice?
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:11, archived)
# nobody knows - it is against their beliefs to open the smaller tupperware.
To open one would call upon the wrath of God or some-such; not too dissimilar from when the Nazis opened up the Ark of the Covenant that time.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:22, archived)
# Could you get a whole VW Golf in one of them?
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:12, archived)
# Oh of course - their backpacks are blessed with much space and many pouches.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:18, archived)
# I'm goign to have to "go mormon" just to aquire one of these backpacks :D
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:24, archived)
# They have a poo pouch too. For poo.
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:30, archived)
# now THAT is practical!
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:33, archived)
# this is one of my favouritest lists ever
(, Tue 29 Sep 2009, 14:55, archived)