Christ on a bike
If you're going to cook live seafood:
1. Learn how to kill or stun it properly first.
(hint - twatting it on a work surface is not the way i'd do it) A sharp knife through the back of it's head immediately prior to cooking will do it, on a lobster there's even a handy cross type thing to aim at.
2. Don't play with it or coo at it. At least do it the service of leaving it be, you are about to boil it and eat its bits so I reckon that'll do it on the pissing off stakes
3. Put it in the freezer for about 10 mins prior to cooking, at least then it will be asleep and won't feel the searing, boiling water if you fuck up section 1, ehich is easily done
4. GET YOUR TEN QUID OUT FOR A PAN BIG ENOUGH TO FIT THE FUCKER IN FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS FLUFFY
That concludes Boyo81's crab cooking rant. Thanks for tuning in. Next time, skinning kittens.
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boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 22:21,
Reply)
I think also
5. Don't bother, crabs are more trouble than they are worth.
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Zuowan, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 22:36,
Reply)
Yeah I think that.
Fiddly bastards. How dare they not be easier for me to eat!
Lobster on the other hand...
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boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 22:38,
Reply)
Any chance you can let me know about the skinning of kittens now?
I doubt they'll be unconscious for much longer.
Ta.
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redazril I LIKE DRUGS!, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 22:43,
Reply)
I'll give you a hint
It starts by bashing them on a work surface and getting your missus to squeal about it a bit.
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boyo81 was laying down his ordinance on, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 23:10,
Reply)
Ha.
I guess you are right.
I look forward to the next installment :D
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Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!, Wed 11 Feb 2009, 23:00,
Reply)
