Pube
I noticed my first white pube on the day of my father's funeral. That made me feel very old. There were tears in my eyes as I flushed it down the toilet. Not because I was sad at coming face to face with own mortality, but because it stung like buggery when I pulled it out.
(Smale is stuffed, Wed 27 Apr 2016, 10:01, Reply)

I showed my kids a cassette the other day.
And asked them to guess what it was. My eldest suggested it was a dvd. It was then I realised that they don't know what dvd is either. All my DVDs have been in storage since they were ripped to the plex box and everything else has been streamed for years. We stopped watching TV and switched to Amazon Prime and Netflix. The only physical media they can identify is a USB memory stick. I feel old at first, but then I think about Mcbeef desperately trying to convince his sprog that the sound quality on the Edison wax cylinder phonograph he bought in his 20's when it first came out, is loads better than high resolution digital audio. Then I feel loads younger again.
( Peej, Wed 27 Apr 2016, 9:40, 2 replies)

My Kids have never heard of Sesame Street
It's not been shown on UK TV since 2001
( Peej, Wed 27 Apr 2016, 9:02, Reply)

What's one of those?
Background: girlfriend and I would regularly "babysit" her friend's three kids from down the road. Two of them were just regular, nice kids, but the third was REALLY sharp - the kind of kid you had to remind yourself was only nine when you were talking to him, because he had the facts at his fingertips to back up his opinion of Schumacher's pit stop strategy against Hakkinen.

So my mate and I are talking to him about something one afternoon in about 1998, and we were trying to describe something to him that was gliding around across the floor. "Like a Dalek" I said.

"What's a Dalek?" he said.

Mate and I looked at each other and realised the last time there was a Dalek on the telly, this kid wasn't born. At the time, it seemed reasonable to suppose he'd grow up never really knowing what a Dalek was. And given that he would have been about 15 or 16 by the time Eccleston turned up, he was part of the generation that missed out. Oof.
(SonofRojBlake, Wed 27 Apr 2016, 7:04, 3 replies)

Senior
When I was first offered a senior citizen's ticket (by a 300 old lady). I was 40. This year, an older member of the cast of the show I was in asked if I was still working. I'm now 43.

I guess I don't look that young.
(ThisIsMyRealName, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 21:43, Reply)

An actress in her twenties turned to me in the pub and said, "I love that white streak you've had put in your hair."
So it's not all bad :)
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 20:35, 6 replies)

Over Christmas we took the missus's niece and nephews to see the new Star Wars film
One said, "I've seen the original trilogy, my mum had them in these black boxes with two white circles on them."
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 20:33, Reply)

For some reason we were talking about Keanu Reeves in the office
One of the lads I work with had never heard of him. Further probing revealed he'd never seen the Matrix though he was familiar with it as "that old film where everything's a dream".
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 19:44, 6 replies)

I've know Pooflake - late of this parish - for 20 years

(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 19:15, Reply)

The brides are looking younger these days
I photograph weddings for a living and for a long time I've been aware that the couples are significantly younger than me, but I've now reached an age where even people getting married for a second time are significantly younger than me and have children that are grown and already married.

On the plus side, most of these youngsters don't own a camera and just use the shitty ones on their phones, so when they see the pictures I've taken, it's a bit like bringing fire to savages.
( Snappyuk gets BIGGER with free sample., Tue 26 Apr 2016, 18:10, Reply)

I found a copy of Ministry of sound
2000 in a CD shop in birkenhead. It was the same copy i had when i was in Uni. Which i had lost, or had become too scratched to listen to. It was even still in a celophane wrapper. Amazed, I put it on in the car home for my 12 yr old son. These are classics, I told him.

Getting the first tune up, I quickly realised this was one of the shit songs, so i skipped after 20 seconds... the 2nd song was the same.... Then the 3rd was Zombie nation, which was ok for about a minute and it started to annoy me... Alice Deejay was 4th, which was great until that also started to annoy me...

3 mins later I was skipping out of song 21 and the CD returned to song No.1

Bollocks I thought... They were proper tunes when i was a kid, and I used to make my whole family put up with the music from the backroom everytime i played on the Playstation.

Took the CD out of the player, and returned to BBC Radio 2. ELO mr blue sky was on, which we both sang all the way home.
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 16:28, 6 replies)

The kid chairing a meeting mentioned that most the men at the table were old enough to be his father
I made an attempt at wit and said -- It's not inconceivable that I'm your grandfather, I was a precocious lad.
A mate immediately grabbed me and the kid in a bear hug and said -- Daddy! Sonny! I've found you at last. Ya rotten bastards...
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 14:35, Reply)

You know when you're past it when the music you love
is sold on CD packaged with other songs purely because they were released in the same decade, and when your kids refer to music you think is still fresh as 'oldies'.
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Tue 26 Apr 2016, 7:56, 4 replies)

Just call me Methuselah
I knew I was getting long in the tooth when I realised that I started work at this company 5 years before my boss was born and 15 years before her boss was born. 
(hal9001, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 22:15, 1 reply)

I recently met someone whom I get along with really well, in the platonic sense. We both love movies, and are a bit socially awkward, but our relationship developed in the normal way, and we became friends ... but not mates. Whenever I asked him to do something social, he'd make excuses. In fact he cancelled something with just thirty minutes to go. Now, I've given up - heck, I already have mates.

I'd assumed this mate-reluctance was maybe because I am gay (and a bit effeminate) and he is your typical man's man (but not a man's man, if you see what I mean). But I found out from someone else that he was "scared to socialise with you as he thinks people may think that you're his dad."

He's in his mid thirties :(.
(iwrite4u, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 20:48, Reply)

Shortly after Oscar Pistorius was sentenced to five years for culpable homicide
Rather than the expected verdict of guilty of murder, I overheard a group of students at the university at which I work
have the following conversation.

Student one - Oh em gee! Did you hear about Oscar Pistorius only getting five years!

Student two - yeh man, he totally got away with murder

Student three - Yeh well! My mum was telling me about this guy called O J Simpson who got away with murder even though every one knew he did it!

This was the exact moment at which I stopped feeling young.
( Peej, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 20:38, Reply)

People keep yelling at me to
'GROW THE FUCK UP!'
( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 18:19, Reply)

ID
Another grey hair sprouts out of my nose every time I ID some kid who looks like they should still have a Beano subscription and find out that they're 20.
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 17:25, Reply)

i remeber some stuff from the first time round.
other stuff, not so much.
( Ya What Skiddlyboop, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 16:58, Reply)

2 weeks ago
when talking to a girl i was on a course with. i didn't think she was much younger than me, until she mentioned that i was the same age as her mother.
bitch.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 16:28, Reply)

Fucking hipster cunts, the lot of you. With your trendy ironic haircuts and overpriced coffees.
Go fuck yourselves.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 16:22, Reply)

Half the people at my end of the office have completely different cultural touchstones from me.
My kids assume I'll be dead before they reach 20.
Joint pain.
Slippers.

Still, your nan helps me feel young again.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 16:13, 3 replies)

Someone I work with is technically young enough to be my own son

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 16:02, 2 replies)

First
Generation
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 25 Apr 2016, 16:00, Reply)