Well this has been lovely.
We've made this place all about me and I feel like we've achieved something a bit special by giving you weepy losers a little focus in your lives. I'll be off in a short while. If you're going to kill yourselves please try to take scaryduck with you. And leave your sneakers in neat lines. Thank you.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 8:17, 68 replies)

Can I be Bunsen?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 8:53, closed)

We all have the power to be whoever we want to be, double-m

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 8:57, closed)

I really want to be Superman.
How much belief do I need before I gain actual superpowers?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 9:26, closed)

true story ... my uncle fostered then adopted some kids and at the point they were formally adopted they had the option of changing their first names
the eldest asked to change it to Sarah, the next to Peter, the youngest to Spiderman.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 9:29, closed)

You flouncing?
100-1 says you can't stay away for more than 48hrs.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:17, closed)

I'm going to a festival.
Much as I enjoy the obsessive adoration of a dozen dribbly dweebs and their desperate sock puppets, you're only fun when I'm at work.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:20, closed)

Never had you down as a Cropredy type

(Guy Debord cette mauvaise réputation..., Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:44, closed)

is that where you eat poop?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:57, closed)

and smear it all over your face
(but in reality, Wilderness, obv)
(Guy Debord cette mauvaise réputation..., Wed 6 Aug 2014, 11:57, closed)

Three minutes.

Well done.

How did you cope for those 180 seconds?
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:53, closed)

*belm*
"I'll be off in a short while."
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:57, closed)

lol povvo sneaker-wearer

( .Yeti., Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:44, closed)

it was a terribly tasteful reference to the Heaven's Gate mass suicide.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:56, closed)

Didn't they all die with their shoes on?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 13:32, closed)

they all had matching Nike sneakers to make it extra double creepy

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 15:45, closed)

Lol middle-age man desperately trying to sound cool.

Festival? Two tinnies in your rubbish-strewn backyard does not a festival make.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:57, closed)

I do two or three festivals a year ... advantage of having an au pair

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:58, closed)

Showing off on a half-dead messageboard. The validation you so desperately seek will not be found here.

Seek solace elsewhere.
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 11:04, closed)

yerr ... this would prolly be more cutting if you hadn't spent a couple of years dribbling about an imaginary property empire

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 11:05, closed)

having an au pair not acting your age
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 15:16, closed)

soz grandma ... not all of us have had to settle for middle-aged, suburban mediocrity

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 15:31, closed)

i'm younger than you and i live in the centre of london
i do hope your consulting is more accurate than that. tut tut.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 17:20, closed)

Christ alive you really are thicker than almighty fuck.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 18:29, closed)

Quick, quick
Tell us again how much you earn and how many degrees you have? That was really impressive last time you wheeled out the "everyone else is thick" card.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 22:18, closed)

I wouldn't bother
He will probably come over all "I had better delete this thread" or come up with a load of Gillian McKeith style degrees or doctorates.
Mind you, with the amount of shit flinging he does, I wouldn't be suprised if he eats his own shit.
( Tesco Quality 60.825659, -0.788337, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 22:26, closed)

I think with the shit eating you are confusing popular forum member Shambo with the even more
popular forum member Ms. Swipe.
( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 8:54, closed)

it's easily done
we look very alike
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:09, closed)

I have much better tits
and brain
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:17, closed)

alright doley, pipe down

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:20, closed)

^still genuinely upset that I'm cleverer and more successful^
and don't have knee-length knockers
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:22, closed)

so is this "festival" like some sort of doley retraining scheme?
will they teach you how to use ms word?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:29, closed)

SRS though ... why could you possibly care? it's kinda creepy and weird

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:33, closed)

i think it's important to try and integrate you into society, although god knows where they could put you. and at the moment, you're a terrible drain on the tax payer.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:35, closed)

yeah ... soz ... I just don't get it
you clearly have an issue with a stranger on the internet ... that's proper Fairholme territory, mate
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:37, closed)

i don't have any issue
i just think you're utterly unemployable
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:46, closed)

which makes you an idiot

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:59, closed)

ahhh, ok
so YOU get to make judgments about people based on their posts. but anyone judging you on YOUR posts is an idiot.

well this makes perfect sense.

no wonder nobody wants to work with you, ever.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 11:04, closed)

do shut up, love

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 11:05, closed)

it's clear that concepts expressed in words of more than one syllable confuse and anger you. don't fight it, try to explore it. you might learn something, and if not, well, you TRIED and that's what counts.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 11:11, closed)

ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

( rofl harris, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 14:17, closed)

you're welcome

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 15:31, closed)

Kisses...
Thanks for taking me off ignore, you big silly!
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 18:34, closed)

I can't believe how upset I am about how upset you are.
You've let me down, you've let yourself down, you've let the whole forum down.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Wed 6 Aug 2014, 23:12, closed)

^upset

(Dr Doctor Can't you see I'm burning burning?, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 8:43, closed)

^upset

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 8:43, closed)

no I am!

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:17, closed)

^

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 9:12, closed)