Appropriately named, I thought
Cats.
Normally, I love 'em. One part buzzing cuddlesome bundle, one part attention-starved leg-bumper, and occasionally, twelve parts malevolant screeching utter bastard.

This cat was called Spider. Adopted by my half-sister as a kitten and named due to it's tendancy to scale walls as a kitten. Or so i'm told.

Anyway. The upwardly-mobile kitten grew into a great big fat sneering ginger tomcat that radiated a permanent threat of imminent attack.
If this cat could grasp a bottle it'd glass you for looking at him funny.
Except in the presence of aforementioned half-sister, when it'd become a innocent ball of fuzz in return for being constantly plied with people food.

So! I am seven and visiting the aforementioned, with blond locks, blue eyes, and a sunny disposition towards kitties. I toddle over to Spider who glares at me with venomous slitted eyes. 'Just fucking try it', they say. I take absolutely no notice of this and reach out to stroke the nice kitty.
It hisses, yowls, and spits. Claws flex outwards, and it leaps up and attatches itself very firmly to my face like something from Alien, sinking all four claws into the back of my neck and head to the bone.

My folks who are having a quiet drink out in the garden are suprised to see their son run out with a sound of ARGHARGHARGHHELLLLLLLPP, arms flailing and an extremely angry cat for a head.
With a little help, the cat is detatched, bolts over the wall, and everyone shits themselves laughing.

I of course go and hide indoors and avoid the cat like the plague whenever I visit for the next eight years or so.

(Hooray, QotW cherry popped, length joke, hello all)
(Sundayturkey has the biggest mug of tea, Fri 25 Apr 2008, 13:26, 5 replies)

LOL
I've had a similar situation happen to me in the past.
My mate had this cat, it was the size of a dog, about 14 years old, and named Krissy.
The bastard used to bail me up when I'd go to the toilet, and unleash hell on me when I'd try to get past lol

I remember one night sitting on the lounge, looking down the hall, and seeing satan glaring at me, the little fucker ran up the side of the chair, hissed and hooked my head, then bolted off.

Never did it to anyone else either :|
(sinewriter, Fri 25 Apr 2008, 13:33, closed)

'Extremely angry cat for a head'
Clicky for that alone
(osok Rebel without a clue, Fri 25 Apr 2008, 13:56, closed)

^ what osok said
And hello, by the way. Welcome to the somewhat random, goat shagging world that is QOTW.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 25 Apr 2008, 15:07, closed)

Cheers Davros
I've lurked b3ta for close on three years, though, just never occoured to me to start posting. Only got around to making an account recently, too.
(Sundayturkey has the biggest mug of tea, Fri 25 Apr 2008, 15:11, closed)

Cat for a head
Ah yes...I've had a cat for an arm, but not a head.


Hello SundayTurkey! Welcome to QOTW.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sat 26 Apr 2008, 11:24, closed)