This is my five point manifesto for when I'm rightfully recognised as Britain's leader
1) Dig up all the streets. Replace britain's roads with a system of bike lanes and maglev trams and nice potted azaleas. The occasional bike/tram accident would enough to keep the azaleas well fertilised.
2) Invade Belgium. They wouldn't be expecting it.
3) Have each individual's yearly tax rate determined by spinning a Wheel of Tax. It would stop complacency.
4) To boost tourism I'd put Ye Olde in front of all road names. "Ye Olde M56 to Barnsley". The yanks would fucking love it.
5) I would make Britain great again, get Britain working again, put jobs first. And education first. Jobs and education would get equal first and have to be referred to the fourth umpire for video analysis. I would cut the deficit. We would have a deficit deficit under myself. I would take Britain out of europe. We will join the Mercosul if they'll have us. And we need to stop the number of immigrants. Under my rule, no Britain will be allowed to leave these shores so help me god.
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 10:14, 22 replies)

You can't even fucking spell azaleas, so you're off to a flyer there, aren't you?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 29 Apr 2015, 10:24, closed)

fuck off, looser

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 11:19, closed)

You're UKIP, aren't you?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 29 Apr 2015, 11:20, closed)

yes, I'm the entire political party

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 11:23, closed)

If you're looking to be pedantic, you could perhaps re-read your OP and start there.
For example, you can't take Britain out of Europe. You could take it out of the EU, but unless there's some unexpected continental drift, we'll always be part of Europe.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 29 Apr 2015, 13:26, closed)

I think you'll find we have already drifted.
Hence becoming an island.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 29 Apr 2015, 16:52, closed)

How far have we drifted since we joined the EU?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 30 Apr 2015, 9:24, closed)

quite a way to the right

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 10:19, closed)

wouldn't those be emigrants, not immigrants?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 10:39, closed)

they'd be immigrating somewhere. stands to reason
best not take any chances
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 11:17, closed)

This will work.

(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 11:20, closed)

pretty sure Britain can't leave its own shores
unless you meant Briton.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 13:13, closed)

well that seemed to go well.
what do you do for an encore?
( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 13:17, closed)

'a deficit deficit under myself'?
You can't even use your own language.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 13:27, closed)

that's why I borrow somebody else's

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 22:33, closed)

a spastic's

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 23:14, closed)

Of all the qotw's in all the world, why do the autistics wander into mine?

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 6:29, closed)

because your written entries to qotw indicate that English is not your first language

(Good evening Good evening, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 8:26, closed)

at least mine aspire to something other than your monosyllabic brainfarts
b3ta.com/users/searchposts.php?id=94760&board=qotw&start=3
( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 10:18, closed)

Yet you have reached middle age without grasping the very basics of grammar.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 10:49, closed)

none of your excellent grammar can compensate for your personality, I'm afraid

( cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 13:43, closed)

i no ur but wat am i lol

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 15:56, closed)

excellent grammar? dozer?
lolololol
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 17:21, closed)

you horrid bully

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Apr 2015, 18:03, closed)

Can't be any worse than the current lot.
(ParaSitius is an Optimistic Pessimist, Wed 29 Apr 2015, 16:17, closed)

Lold at 2)

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Wed 29 Apr 2015, 16:53, closed)