Bank Computer Piracy
I support bank computer systems. Big UNIX ones. One of those computer systems has the acronym 'PIRATE', although I can't remember what it means.

So there's the exposition. I received an alert earlier today telling me that the filesystem '/var' had filled up. Turned out to be some user log files, or something. To let the owner of the files know about this, I sent this message:

"Please delete some of your old log files from PIRATE's /vaaaaaarrrrrrrr filesystem :-)"

He replied --quite sternly-- with:

"Done. btw I've just noticed that PIRATE has not been updated to the latest patch release. Patch releases 'A' through to 'H' have been applied, but I think we're currently on 'I'

Please apply an 'I' patch to PIRATE as soon as possible."

In a truly bizarre twist, he was correct too. I am literally applying an 'I' patch to PIRATE right now. I have no idea if his brilliant (and relevant) riposte was accidental due to his total lack of acknowledgment of the original japery.
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 10:06, 20 replies)

I liked it more when you posted it in OT
It's more rubbishy here.
( Captain V, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 10:17, closed)

charming
This was ALL your idea, catface :-p
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 11:12, closed)

We called our Head Office Access Routers
HOAR1 and HOAR2 and man did they put out, especially over the Head Office Management Overlay network.

The Technical Design Authority on their wide area (branch) network liked to refer to himself as the WAN KING (BEng, CEng, CITP, MBCS)
( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 10:30, closed)

Nice
I like it
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 11:17, closed)

Way back when ...
I used to earn my keep. I worked as a DBA.

All the servers were named after gods. Every ancient pantheon was represented; Greek, Roman, Assyrian, even fuckin Welsh Pagan deities.

Our Payments system was on a server called HECATE. The fuckin thing was up and down like a whore's knickers. We tried everything.

And then ... I looked up the name. She was the Greek Goddess of Witches. We renamed the server ... and it purred like a kitten. NO trouble at all.

Spooky.
(Que?, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 10:45, closed)

Worked in comms for an American Bank in Tokyo
The server room had a small shinto shrine by the door outside and the reuters servers which broke down a few months back were covered in prayers written on decorative pieces of paper. Flowers in the glass vase on the floor below them were changed daily.

worked a treat.
( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 12:29, closed)

I work in Tokyo
for a German bank. Small world...
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 13:41, closed)

But I wouldn't like to paint it!
Ohio g'fuckin' guymas !!

Are they still showing "The Caddy Shack" with a can of Boddingtons on sunday evenings down the Telerate bar in roppongi? Or have you gone all tepanyaki?

;-)
( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 16:15, closed)

I had to look up 'Telerate'
they mostly just call it Motown (1 & 2) these days. I call it Ho-town, but if I'm being honest it's absolutely chock-full of she-boys.

I don't find them attractive, it's just confusing...
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 16:29, closed)

Did you reply...
Aye 'I' cap'n?

(sorry)
(annexed, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 12:29, closed)

His name's John
In retrospect, I should have replied 'Won't be Long John (Silver)'
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 13:47, closed)

I know fuck all about computers
but I know that I like this. That fella was either a comedic genius or a bit of a nonce... lets hope its the genius thing *click*
( SpankyHanky, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 13:19, closed)

He's quite a staid gentleman of advancing years
I fear it went straight over the top of his shiny head. Thanks for clicking though, I shall deposit it in my high-interest account.
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 13:50, closed)

Bar har har har!
Nice to know the inherent humour in everything shows itself even in something as joyless as banking computer systems.
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 13:26, closed)

Tell me about it
Glad this trivial piece of routine admin work brought a tiny sliver of happiness into your day :-)
( chart cat has an itch, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 13:49, closed)

'I like this!'...
...therefore I *click* this.
( TheMagicDwarf is back like ballroom dancing, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 15:41, closed)

Now back in the day
When my team was

Cardiff University Network Technicians (Fast Action Response Team)

Needless to say we were forbidden from getting T-shirts printed up for some reason!
( RadG Drinking Mojitos in the sun, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 15:52, closed)

lol
OMG my six year old luves that sort of thing.
( buffet_the_appetite_slayer ٩(●̮̃•)۶ jacked in to the ICE on, Wed 22 Jul 2009, 16:27, closed)

A bloke at my old office
was a Fellow of the Association of Accounting Technicians (FAAT) and a Fellow of the Association of Chartered Accountants (FACA).

Coincidentally, he was a rather portly gentleman as well...
( TheMagicDwarf is back like ballroom dancing, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 10:50, closed)

What can I spend all these lovely clicks on?
I know... a shiny red internet bicycle, for navigating the forums at speed!


( chart cat has an itch, Thu 23 Jul 2009, 7:39, closed)