Only last
week, my bed caught fire, and the firebrigade had to climb up 35 flights of stairs pulling hoses behind them. Their progress was hampered by a 747, on which both pilots had eaten fish and got convulsive food poisoning, crashing through the window, spilling burning jet fuel into the huge crevice opened up in the floor by an earthquake.

Fortunately, the following Tsunami quenched the conflagration, but almost immediately afterwards the celing collased when a meteorite hit the house. Several firemen were trapped, and it turns out one of them was carrying a nuclear bomb, and the shockwaves had set off the timer on it.

A bald bloke climed in bravely, but he cut the fucking BLUE wire on the bomb, and it went off, spreading radiation all over the room, and onto the landing outside. This caused widespread radiation sickness within the herd of wildebeast that had strayed from their traditional migration path into my house, because the Army had set a cordon across the plain they use, to isolate the herd of ebola carrying monkeys that had escaped a forest fire.

My Mum was fucking furious when she got home.
(username failed moderation, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:50, 11 replies)

Venn Diagram to the rescue!

                        __.......__                        
                   _.-''           '-..                    
                ,-'                    '-.                 
              ,'                          '.               
            ,'                              '\             
           /                                  `            
          /                                    `.          
         /                                      \          
        |                                        |         
        |                                        |         
        |                                         |        
        |                wacky                    |        
        |                                        .'        
        |                                        |         
         |                                      .'         
          \                                     /          
           \                                  ,'           
            `                                /             
             '.                            ,'              
               '-.                      _,'             
                  '-._              _,-'                   
                      '`--......---'              




                        __.......__                        
                   _.-''           '-..                    
                ,-'                    '-.                 
              ,'                          '.               
            ,'                              '\             
           /                                  `            
          /                                    `.          
         /                                      \          
        |                                        |         
        |                                        |         
        |              funny                      |        
        |                                         |        
        |                                        .'        
        |                                        |         
         |                                      .'         
          \                                     /          
           \                                  ,'           
            `                                /             
             '.                            ,'              
               '-.                      _,'             
                  '-._              _,-'                   
                      '`--......---'              

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:02, closed)

Boobs!
(bergec is filled with inertia, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 22:02, closed)

You can post pictures on here, look-

( Zuowan, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 7:05, closed)

Yes. But it's funnier as ascii.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 8:44, closed)

It's not.

( Zuowan, Wed 29 Jun 2011, 2:37, closed)

Oooh!
Dr Shambolic has cast judgement.

Thanks Doc. You know your opinion means the world to me.
(username failed moderation, Tue 28 Jun 2011, 9:41, closed)

I like the cut of your jib.
I have clicked the appropriate button to register this fact.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:18, closed)

Pah! Call that a disaster?!
er.... click
(SpangoTheWonderBadger is brewing beer, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:21, closed)

Did a chocolate-mint icecream land on you?

(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 17:23, closed)

and your mum was furious with you because you had cracked one out and couldnt get it up again thus depriving her of walking in to what was left of your room and catching you wanking as she bought you a cup of tea


and breath
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:01, closed)

4/10
Needs more disastrous anal sex.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 19:51, closed)