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This is a question Books

We love books. Tell us about your favourite books and authors, and why they are so good. And while you're at it - having dined out for years on the time I threw Dan Brown out of a train window - tell us who to avoid.

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 5 Jan 2012, 13:40)
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Stephen King's 'Insomnia'. Should be called 'A CURE for Insomnia'.
What a boring book. Tried it several times, given up in despair.

I've read Lord knows how many books, of every genre, but only that one's beaten me.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 8:22, 16 replies)
Joseph Heller's 'Something Happend'.
Nothing happend...
(I helped save b3ta! Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Wed 11 Jan 2012, 9:31, closed)
It is still better than 'Closing Time'

(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:13, closed)
^
That book makes me very sad
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:35, closed)
Gotta agree on that one
it has just enough going on to make you keep reading, but about 3/4 of the way through even that isn't enough, and it just deteriorates into a big steaming pile of crap.
(username failed moderation, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 9:35, closed)
Bible? More like "BORE-ble."
etc
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Wed 11 Jan 2012, 9:37, closed)
Can I just say
I came very close to writing exactly this as my response. I am glad to see my rejected jokes still have a life.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:56, closed)
That would have been just as funny
if you hadn't used ALL CAPS to make your point.

Funnier, in fact.

(Sorry, I actually like you, I don't know why I felt compelled to say that. I'll seek help)
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:11, closed)

JUST A FUNNY
!!!

FUNNY. haha
(I helped save b3ta! enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:13, closed)
I did say 'funnier in fact'
Which was my bitchy way of saying it wasn't funny in the first place.

I swear, I am too subtle for B3ta...

edit: Oh...Ninja'd, sorry...
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:14, closed)

ninja editing sneak!
(I helped save b3ta! enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:17, closed)
"A heartbreaking work of staggering genius" should have been called "A tedious memoir by somebody with nowt much to say"

(IHateSprouts is baking a huge pie shaped like an enormous pie, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:30, closed)
And didn't you think that the lolwaki magazine him and his friends produced
sounded like the biggest pile of steaming elephant wank ever?
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:36, closed)
I learned the Stephen King lesson with the Tommyknockers
I realised I could read the first, say, 10 chapters then skip to the last 10 chapters and absolutely nothing of import had happened in the intervening three-quarters of the book.
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:37, closed)
For my GCSE's I wrote about how brilliant King was.
I wrote about 'It' and 'Pet Cemetery'.

I reread both at Uni. They aren't actually very good.
(I helped save b3ta! scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 10:54, closed)
"It" would be quite good if you took out "it" altogether
it would be a decent, medium-length novel about a bunch of kids growing up, going their separate ways and then getting together later in life.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 11:19, closed)
Gosh.
That'd be riveting.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 11 Jan 2012, 15:54, closed)

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