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This is a question Brain Fade

Freddie Woo tells us how he recently spent ages trying to open his front door with his Oyster Card before realising he actually needed things called "keys". Tell us of times you've done stupid things while on auto-pilot

(, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 12:20)
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I went to use the toilet for a number 2
pre-flow, todger-in-hand, I looked down to check my aim. I was stood over the bin in my kitchen. Ran to the toilet to find that I'd put some rubbish in there.

EDIT - Got me numbers mixed up! I were doin' a number 1 in the bin. That'll learn me for trying to be polite rather than just say piss...
(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 11:31, 12 replies)
Glad to see I'm not the only one who holds his cock when taking a shit

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 11:43, closed)
Wanking whilst shitting is a noble pastime

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 12:12, closed)
Wait, you hold his cock while you shit?

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 14:56, closed)
We take it in turns

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 15:10, closed)
I pissed in the bin
in a hotel room before. It had a mirror in front of it, as did my toilet at home. I only realised what was going on when instead of a tinkling noise, there was the sound of a stream of piss hitting a metal bin. No, I wasn't drunk.
(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 13:42, closed)
Taking a shit whilst standing near the bin in your kitchen sounds a little more serious than brain fade.

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 14:30, closed)
Imagine if you'd had to explain to anyone unfortunate
enough to walk in on you. I wonder what tale your brain would have formulated.
(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 14:55, closed)

I'm guessing his brainfade has dimmed the memory of what numbers one and two represent....
(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 18:02, closed)
I am also going to make a joke about the fact that 'number two' traditionally refers to defecation rather than micturition.

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 18:10, closed)
I, Slow

(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 21:16, closed)
This is now my favourite thread of the week and should win.
Make it so.
(, Fri 22 Mar 2013, 22:11, closed)

(, Sat 23 Mar 2013, 1:10, closed)

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