Right, last lot because I've compiled 900 of them for a book and I don't want to give away the ending
Isaac Newton had to correct his maths four times before everything fell downwards

16% of UK asylum seekers are really just dodgy Frenchmen who have blacked up to get a free holiday

There is an octopus at Brighton Sea-Life Centre that can play "Snap!"

If you put a cup of Bovril in front of Stephen Hawking, then leave the room, he'll reach across and have a drink

Dandy regular, "Desperate Dan" was so called because until 1961, each storyline featured him trying to get off with anyone with tits

There is a nomadic people in central Russia that communicate with a bizarre variation on charades

Jennifer Lopez's first taste of fame came in 1988 when she won the village fair talent contest in Hampaste, Kentucky by farting the theme from "Airwolf".

In rural Arkansas, gloves have only 3 fingers

Captain Pugwash originally contained dubiously-named characters such as "Seaman Staines", "Master Bates", "Roger the Cabin Boy" and of course Pugwash's parrot "Wanky Fuckstick"

The Inuit people of Northwest Canada, who live in a confined space within an igloo for 8 months of the year, have 27 words for "Who farted?".
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:14, 9 replies)

i want to move to Hampaste, Kentucky

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:22, closed)

36% of the commercial buildings in Liverpool
Have air conditioning outlet vents that face north.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:30, closed)

bollocks
they haven't fucking GOT air conditioning!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:31, closed)

That's what they WANT you to think!

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:41, closed)

i'm going into town to check this out

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 17:49, closed)

oh my fucking christ
If you published I would buy
(mymilkshakebringsallthemongstotheyard poison hearts, poison minds - joining hate, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 20:02, closed)

See
Wanky Fuckstick is an acceptable name for parrots Nan, none of the Polly nonsense
(Mmmmminty all the beatles are aliens except for George, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 21:54, closed)

I must correct you
Rural Arkansas gloves have six fingers. Thank Bill Clinton for that.
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Fri 14 Jan 2011, 22:14, closed)

But three of them are fused together into a bizarre paddle-shaped mitt.

True fact.
(Large Hardon Collider Bah Bloody Humbug, Sat 15 Jan 2011, 4:47, closed)