Bus Mentalist
I live in a nice quiet (ish) village in the north of England. Although it is mainly a quiet village, we have a fair few nut cases. (Please bear in mind over the road from my house, there is an actual NHS funded nut house).

Sooooooooo.............anyway, the ACTUAL story is below.

I needed to go to town one day for something or other, and as I approached the bus stop (this was before I aquired by driving license) I saw one of the local nutters. When I got to the bus stop, he simply asked "Bus due?" to which I replied "Not sure mate". Most people would have been content with this answer, but he continually asked me, "Bus due? Bus due?" over and fucking over again, until it arrived.

After getting on the bus, and sitting as far as fucking possible away, we eventually reached the town. The fucking nutty bloke got up, got off the bus, and then proceeded to cross the street, and get back on the same bus to go home again. Nut job. Total nut job.


Sorry about the shitness of the story.............
(mattmatt, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 15:23, 3 replies)

Don't apologise for the shitness of the story, just spice it up with some gore and / or sexual fluid.
As below.

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I live in a nice, quietish village in the north of England. Well, I say quiet, we have some nutters living in a local house sponsored by the NHS.

Anyway....

I was taking the bus into town for some unremembered errand, when one of the local mentalists approached me. He then proceeded to ask me if the bus was due over and over. It was amazingly fucking aggravating. I began to wonder how I could make his impending death look like he'd committed suicide after about five minutes (I think the best one involved a burst sewer pipe tipping a tree over, impaling him on it's death-coated branches of doom).

He didn't bother me through the entire bus trip into town, where he promptly walked across the road and took the bus straight back home.

Cunt.


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(Scritty Bakerman., Wed 1 Jul 2009, 15:58, closed)

my mate had one come up to him
while he was at the bus stop. he wasn't eating anything and wasn't even carrying any food, so it was rather surprising when this nutter woman leaned over to him and said "don't worry, you'll find someone to share your sandwiches with one day."
then she walked away...
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 1 Jul 2009, 16:54, closed)

perhaps
she meant maybe he'll find the love of his life one day.

this is pretty sweet actually. awww
(it's not hash mixed drops, Thu 2 Jul 2009, 8:04, closed)