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This is a question Annoying words and phrases

Marketing bollocks, buzzword bingo, or your mum saying "fudge" when she really wants to swear like a trooper. Let's ride the hockey stick curve of this top hat product, solutioneers.

Thanks to simbosan for the idea

(, Thu 8 Apr 2010, 13:13)
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As a marketing manager for a small company...
... one of my responsibilities at work is creating brochures full of flowery rhetoric, a task which I quite enjoy because it lets me at least somewhat flex the creative muscle (through Adobe Indesign, Photoshop & Illustrator), at work. Another similar role which I undertake is to regularly craft eloquent press releases on our latest new product launches or project successes.

I do all this listening to last.fm or some other streaming music station on my headphones.. Why?

Because every time I take them off, I hear our cretinous sales girls two desks over, referring to our new video encoder hardware as "us new codecs", or their PC as a "'puter". (Said how it sounds... like poo-ter)

Our company creates technical solutions project by project for some of the most prominent sites in our field in the world. We have a fantastic, SEO optimised website, professional product and solutions based literature and a great product set.

We get lots of enquiries.

The vast majority of which fail to materialise into orders (at least in the UK office), because of the profound inability of our sales staff to speak their native tongue.
(, Sat 10 Apr 2010, 20:27, 4 replies)
It's a bit of a stretch, but...
I call my computer "puter", too. It even has that hostname.

The reason is because "puter" sounds vaguely similar to "puta", which is Spanish for whore, and my computer goes down on me frequently and costs me a lot of money.
(, Sat 10 Apr 2010, 21:48, closed)

I appreciate your honesty and reasoning, but the closest the person I was referring to gets to foreign languages is saying 'pardonne moi' when she farts or burps in the office. (That seriously happens).


I need to get a new job..
(, Sat 10 Apr 2010, 22:20, closed)
solutions
"Our company creates technical solutions project by project for some of the most prominent sites in our field in the world. We have a fantastic, SEO optimised website, professional product and solutions based literature and a great product set."

WANKER. Try speaking English yourself some time.
(, Sun 11 Apr 2010, 21:35, closed)
SEO Optimised
So, Search Engine Optimised Optimised.

Cunt
(, Tue 13 Apr 2010, 14:40, closed)

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