Ligging with the slebs
I was a guest on the Johnny Vaughan show once. So naturally I met Johnny (short arse) and Denise Van Outen (snooty short-arse). I also spent a very pleasant ten minutes talking to Lauren Laverne, all the time with an excellent view down her top.

My spot was a spoof Mastermind quiz, and the gag was that the real Magnuss Magnusson barged in and took over the questions. He was a really nice bloke, very friendly and interesting. He even asked me for my autograph, which was a bizarre moment... (He always got anybody he worked with to sign his script, apparently.)

Even better, it turned out to be the last show of the series, so they'd invited all their previous guests back for the wrap party. Loads of famous faces - Des Lineham (something to do with sport, I believe) I remember, and Ian Duncan Smith - man, he was a freeloader, arrived early, grabbed everything going, and was still drinking the free booze when I left.

But the highlight was meeting Professor Colin Pillinger, the man behind the (unfortunately unsuccessful) Beagle II Mars lander. As a bit of a space nut myself, he was a real hero of mine, so I made sure I got to talk to him! Fascinating chap. He helped analyse the Apollo moon-rock samples, too.

Oh, and my daughter used to play in the same Roller Hockey team as Nick Cave's sons. So we were "hockey dads" on the touchline. He's surprisingly normal. I particularly enjoyed the moment when he called my name and waved to me in a busy shopping centre - lots of puzzled stares, trying to work out if I was famous too.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 6 Dec 2013, 12:37, Reply)