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This is a question Cheap Tat

OneEyedMonster remindes us about the crap you can buy in pound shops: "Batteries that lasted about an hour and then died. A screwdriver with a loose handle so I couldn't turn the damn screw, and a tape measure which wasn't at all accurate."

Similarly, my neighbour bought a lawnmower from Argos that was so cheap the wheels didn't go round, it sort of skidded over the grass whilst gently back-combing it.

What's the cheapest, most useless crap you've bought?

(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 7:26)
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Ethnic Peace Coffee
Yep, even the sanctity of a decent cup of coffee is under threat in these uncertain times at work.

We've run out of Nescafe and instead of simply replacing like for like, we're given "Fair Trade" coffee which might be brilliant for third world farmers, but tastes like Paula Radcliffe's Reeboks. After she's stepped in something.

Right now I'd kill for a cup of decent coffee...
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 13:26, 13 replies)
blugh!
Yeah, like Fair Trade teabags on unbleached recycled paper. Know what? I LIKE the bleachy, non-recycled paper. I LIKE the intensively farmed bananas. I LIKE cheap clothes made by children. In fact, I'm going to demand a rack of clothes in every shop that is made by children, and I don't care if they've gone blind and their hands have fallen off making them. Meh.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 13:33, closed)
There's a reason these hard-up farmers can't sell their coffee
and it is this: It tastes like poo.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 13:36, closed)
Exactly Crackhouse
And third world garment sweing children will at least be saved from the evils of masturbation when their hands fall off.

Although I suppose either way they still go blind...
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 13:37, closed)
Fairtrade = Bollocks
It's just to make pretentious twats feel better about their marginally lower contribution to the buttfucking of poor farmers while oodles of money is still creamed off by middle-men.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 13:48, closed)
But Nescafe is fucking disgusting.
It tastes rancid.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 14:21, closed)
Nescafe?
Agreed. Compared to Costa Coffee, Nescafe tastes like an orangutan's armpit.

However, Nescafe was all we'd get and in the absence of anything better I gre to appreciate it.

You only need taste Ethnic Peace Coffee to realise how nice a cup of Nescafe can be.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 14:33, closed)
I concur
all we get at work is fairtrade teabags coffee and sugar
on a par though i must say is the Lidl brand Arabica coffee, not bad coffee, but then not a bit like coffee either
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 16:01, closed)
Am I a snob?
I drink anything at a push, but I like Douwe Egberts continental gold instant. Nescafe tastes bitter and frankly, fucking horrible.

Fairtrade tea tastes like tesco ladies deodorant.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 16:30, closed)
I always liked the fair trade stuff...
But that's just me I guess.
(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 20:00, closed)
Fairtrade
I bought some Fairtrade Christmas Coffee from M&S for my dad for Christmas (to go with the espresso cups) and it was rather nice, if anyone fancies giving it a try. I only bought it cos it was Christmas flavour :)
(, Sat 5 Jan 2008, 1:18, closed)
Nescafe?
Since when is Nescafe anything other than bitter, rancid shit-in-a-mug?

Then again, I'm a fan of real coffee. Instant's just plain evil.
(, Sat 5 Jan 2008, 18:44, closed)
Hear hear!
I've worked for organisations that provided tea and coffee for their staff. But, always 'Fair Trade' stuff.

The coffee was undrinkable to the point that a group of us would chip in and buy something more palatable, and the tea was as weak as gnats piss. I mean, OK, Fair Trade, perfectly laudable in principle, but have they ever stopped to consider that the reason they weren't able to get a fair price for their coffee was because, like erm, it didn't taste like coffee?

And whilst we are on the subject, what about adopting the Fair Trade principle for UK producers..? Or is that too radical a concept for Tescos and Asda and the like to comprehend?
(, Mon 7 Jan 2008, 15:01, closed)
coffee
the stuff in the black jar, and the stuff in the blue jar that lives next to the fairtrade stuff are both dead nice (although when no ones there with me i put the lavazza in my espresso machine and mage proper coffee, but tis my secret stash!
(, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 16:26, closed)

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