A sorry tale of self abuse.
As a young lad and like every young lad that has come before or will come in the future I was a walking bag of raging fucked up hormones. This resulted in the usual, high voices, acne and hairy palms from masturbating like a chimpanzee on E.
After a day at the school smoking wall regaling one and all (plump chicks) on our masturbatory tales, one of the sixth form told us that if you pulled too hard and were uncircumcised you could pull your foreskin all the way back leaving nothing but a quivering stump of raw bloody flesh. A bit like peeling a banana but with more blood and with a lot more pain.
This useful bit of advice stayed with me from the age of 14 until I was 18, in these 4 years I remained a careful wanker!!
All came to an end when i finished basic training and was posted to Germany. At the hands of a very skillful (and extremely beautiful) lady of the night I found that my foreskin did indeed go all the way back.
What sucked though was the 4 year build up of bell end cheese/smegma!!
(Hammy1801 may have scabies!, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 18:05, 12 replies)

So, your story is 'I don't wash'?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 19:39, closed)

Quite the catch,
weren't you?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 19:46, closed)

I'm calling bullshit.
Surely they at least teach you some basic hygiene in the army?
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 20:23, closed)

This post makes me itch.

( Infidel , shit and wrong, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 20:41, closed)

i was just sick in my mouth.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 21:31, closed)

I thought the army did basic intelligence tests.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 21:55, closed)

And insisted on high standards of personal hygiene and appearance?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 22:48, closed)

This,
I find hard to believe.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 23:26, closed)

True story, you need a degree to get in these days.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sun 22 Jan 2012, 0:55, closed)

I cant believe im not being believed !!!
Its all true(ish). I didnt pull my foreskin back when I began wanking due to the tale from the sixth former. Cheese and smegma may have been exaggerated but the rest is verbatim.
Honestly you can trust me, i'm a priest.
(Hammy1801 may have scabies!, Sat 21 Jan 2012, 23:56, closed)

b3ta.com/questions/childhoodmisconceptions/post1508054
+ and illiterate?
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 22 Jan 2012, 1:52, closed)

I believe
and I clicked.
(justin(e), Mon 23 Jan 2012, 13:46, closed)