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This is a question Churches, temples and holy places

Tell us about the times you've been to a place of worship, and - this being b3ta - how you are now consigned to the everlasting fires of Hell.

(, Thu 1 Sep 2011, 13:50)
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happy clappies
My sister in law joined one of those new age cult type churches, so when she married into the zombie sheeple and had resulting offspring i've since been sex-blackmailed into attending some of their services. They're a real eye opener.

I've never encountered such a bunch of conceited ignorant arrogant fuckwits in all my life. Talk about blind faith... They lap up the bullshit fervently and look to the pastor eagerly for more. The really scary thing is that a lot of these folk are doctors, teachers and lawyers. It really does beggar belief.

On the most recent occasion, they were convincing eachother about the power of prayer. One stepped up and explained hey she'd been congratulated on good performance at work but was praying over money issues. Lo and behold her boss offered her a promotion a few months later. Fuck me! A miracle! Others were praying for babies and wowser, their last chance of IVF worked. Erm no that was the NHS you poor misguided twat!
There are more but i'm getting off the bus now....
(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 18:00, 19 replies)
Sex-blackmailed?
You're fucking your SiL?
(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 18:07, closed)
^
Exactly how I read it.
(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 20:00, closed)
Is there any other way it can be read?

(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 20:55, closed)
Maybe he's fucking his brother.

(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 21:18, closed)
It's possible. Qotw and all that.

(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 21:19, closed)
Probably more likely to be fucking his uncle, surely?

(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 21:39, closed)

fucking his uncle, surely? a shut in, who has never seen the light of day. Qotw and all that.
(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 21:44, closed)
Oh blimey, it's a Fritzl?

(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 22:08, closed)
An uncle fucker, you say?

(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 22:07, closed)
I always thought that fucking sisters and cousins was more a /talk thing?

(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 7:43, closed)
I don't know.
I'd say at least some incestuous boundries have been crossed here in /qotw. Whaddaya reckon AB?
(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 8:51, closed)
You mean the whole Bert fucking his sister thing?

(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 21:24, closed)
He's one
And stuj took advantage of his retarded cousin and fucked her at a wedding , or was it a funeral, whatever he definitely fucked her.
(, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 6:15, closed)
You joy what I meant.
Oddly enough I have actually fucked my sister in law, just not that one. And it was long afford she became related thanks, i'm not from Norfolk!

EDIT: Not that you'd guess from my phone typing anyway...
(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 16:04, closed)
Those keys arej't evej ajyyere jear each other, hoy did you do that?

(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 16:09, closed)
a challenging combination.
Predictive text, on a 2.5in touchscreen and stubby fingers.
(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 17:28, closed)
That or his wife and sister-in-law are rooting,
he knows and even tho he has tried to blackmail them but they have something bigger over him....
(, Mon 5 Sep 2011, 21:00, closed)
My favourite story of prayer
Was the pastor of my ex-wife's church talking about the power of prayer and namechecking a member of the congregation who had a cold, and prayed fervently for God to cure his cold. And after four days of praying morning noon and night, lo and behold the cold was cured!

O_o
(, Tue 6 Sep 2011, 12:39, closed)
Idiots
It was the homeopathic tablets that cured it.
(, Wed 7 Sep 2011, 6:17, closed)

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