Pretending you're posh when everyone knows you're really common as fuck...

Telling everyone you know you went to the South of France on holiday.

Carrying around some idiot designer bag (it's still just a bag!)

Refusing to buy store brand food when everyone knows Morrison's snide monster munch are better than the real thing.

Calling a loo a lavatory.

Fake fur coats.

Paris Hilton- style daughters.

Owning massive cars when you live in the city.

Sending your kids to private school to mix with kids "more like them" (who are you kidding?!)

"Posh" kids on horses (it doesn't make you posh- you have to shovel up their shit!

iPones for business men.

Bluetooth headsets on the bus/shopping/anywhere else you don't fucking need one, but wear 'cos it makes you look busy and important.

University wars ("Oh, your son only got into *** university? Mine's going to Oxford/Cambridge/some other lie when you know he's on a gap year in India).

Buying a "proper" newspaper and secretly just looking at the pictures because you don't actually know what the journalists are talking about.

They're the ones who are common these days! I love cheesy chips, being covered in tattoos, smoking at the bus stop and Primark- and I'm proud!

(Goes back to lurking for another couple of months)

Mel
(mellie, Sun 19 Oct 2008, 16:23, 2 replies)

Hmm
Yup (sorta - if its boastful) Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, and you get the idea.... Chips and cheese, primark and smoking might not be that great but its better than trying to maintain some dumb facade for the sake of your social circle
(Fredz A graveyard of hopes, a dump of ambition, Sun 19 Oct 2008, 16:37, closed)

University wars
heh

My Uncle Bob couldn't wait to ring my mum to tell her when his granddaughter got the required A-levels for Nottingham.

My mum: My grandson Juan Jnr has just got his too, and he's off to Oxford.
Bob: Oh, so he thinks he's going to Oxford, does he?
SLAM
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sun 19 Oct 2008, 20:53, closed)