Not quite on topic, But will pass...
A friend of mine, has a love of Cheese. He likes to consider himself a bit of a connoisseur if you like.

One evening at a party - walking up to a buffet, he is greeted by a table of cheese. All laid out, all different colours and shades. Smells, and textures. He was in heaven, his excitement showed.

Shuffling along with a plate in one hand - spotting a new and unusual cheese and cutting a wedge off, some had to be scooped (Brie)

Sitting down he begins to taste and analyse them.

He then takes a knife and cuts through a relatively smooth cheese, taking a big wedge into his mouth. His eyes glazed over. He was in heaven...

"mmmm" groaned Tom " this cheese is so creamy"


"that’s because its Butter" Said Chris.
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 16:43, 2 replies)

My mate once ate all the butter in a B&B because his mum was on a diet so the house only had Stork.
A whole basket full of little individual pats straight out of their little individual foil wrappers and into his little individual gob.

The landlady wasn't all that chuffed.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:16, closed)

Fuck me, an actually funny story this week.
This wins by default.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 4 Jul 2012, 18:44, closed)