"Hello Mr cs1ca"
"Hello Mr email. To what do I owe the pleasure? Have you come bearing news of an exciting or informative nature?"
"Not really, mr cs1ca, you are at work, after all. I come bearing the dictates of the head office of the bit of the branch of the government you work for"
"Does it relate to people in fluro jackets painting railings?"
"No, mr cs1ca. It has come to their attention that people it employs are using social networking and other internet sites in a way that might bring the organisation into disrepute, or worse put them at risk of possible reprisals, due to our justice-dispensing ways. Here's a list of rules they've come up with"
"Hmmm. It would appear that this set of rules is rather draconian, and, if followed, will severely impact and limit my internet use. 'Don't display or make prominent where you work, for your own safety'? I don't do that anyway. Looking at this, you might think that they thought of the internet as a dark, sinister mass of anarchy and nonces"
"Yes, you might. Bye now!"
"Bye, mr email"

"Hello mr cs1ca"
"Hello again, mr email. I haven't seen you for a couple of months, not since you turned up with that bunch of rules. What do you have this time?"
"Well, mr cs1ca, I bring news. Head office has discovered social media, and now has a facebook page and a twitter feed. I come bearing instruction that you are to 'like' the organisation and forward their output to your friends, whether they care about what you do or not"
"Have they repealed the rules on internet usage?"
"Nope"
"So I'm forbidden from using my facebook account for anything I want, but I'm compelled to spam my friends with their dreary PR?"
"Essentially, yes"
"Mr email: Go back to head office and tell them to fuck right off"
(cs1ca, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 0:40, 5 replies)

Except you never actually told anyone to fuck off, did you?
You thought it in your head, then went back to the dull monotony of whatever job it is that you have that nobody wants to hear about.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 8:44, closed)

Yet you of course are engrossed in your
fantastical life that revolves around posting snide remarks on some website forum.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 26 Feb 2012, 8:56, closed)

I hate cunts that do that. Pricks.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 15:13, closed)

I don't know
whether this level of dedicate is admirable, or frightening. Probably frightening.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 9:51, closed)

Took me longer to code it up than to find it.
Because I'm shit at Computers.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 21:33, closed)

I don't think he actually had a conversation with an email at all.

( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 9:59, closed)

I had a two hour lunch and a crafty wank
Does that count?
(cs1ca, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 16:44, closed)

Nicely written.
*click*
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 10:00, closed)

Anyone who puts their employer on facebook deserves everything they get.
Why, in the name of fuck, would anyone think this is a good idea?
( Slippery Mick ‏, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 12:21, closed)

The hard of thinking, apparently.
I tell them I have neither.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Sun 26 Feb 2012, 14:25, closed)

I suspect the easiest
solution is to not do what they ask.
(username failed moderation, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 10:59, closed)

I'm not
I'm on here, enneye?
(cs1ca, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 11:10, closed)