Hotel SplendidoEnzyme writes, "what about awful hotels, B&Bs, or friends' houses where you've had no choice but to stay the night?"
What, the place in Oxford that had the mattresses encased in plastic (crinkly noises all night), the place in Blackpool where the night manager would drum to the music on his ipod on the corridor walls as he did his rounds, or the place in Lancaster where the two single beds(!) collapsed through metal fatigue?
Add your crappy hotel experiences to our list.
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chthonic, Thu 17 Jan 2008, 16:05)
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Hotel Meridian, Brazzaville, Republic of CongoI arrived in the Congo at the arse end of the country's civil war on a bit of ill-advised business. Le Meridian turned out to be a heavily-armed compound in the centre of the city, next door to the ruins of the cathedral. Amongst its delights:
* The hotel doubled up as the officers' mess of the Congolaise army, so it was crawling with over-dressed young ladies (eyeing up the Europeans for a quick way out), and their angry-looking AK47-toting husbands.
* If you wanted to venture outside, you had to hire a posse of hired goons and the hotel's bullet-riddled Mercedes.
* What I took for charming concrete mouldings around the hotel reception, were in fact, rocket-propelled grenade scars from a recent gun battle over the state of the kitchens.
* The hotel, at one stage, had its own zoo. When I arrived, it had already become the army's practice range and free supply of tasty meat products
* A five minute phone call urging my boss to get me the fuck out of there cost £90.
* Not a trace of Um Bongo
On the plus side, I managed not to mention the war to the German guests.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 8:16,
7 replies)
Gets a clickJust for the mention of Um Bongo. Had me laughing like a drain that did!
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K2k6 has a proper job these days, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 8:28,
closed)
No Um Bongo...but the place is swimming in Vimto.
100% of FACT!
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 8:52,
closed)
AND you had to draw your own pornwell...you didn't "have" to.
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 9:47,
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Ah yes, the pron thingThe Congo Trip: Still giving to B3ta after all these years.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 10:07,
closed)
What an exciting life.....The fact that you visited the Congo and that you mentioned Um-bongo just made me grin like a fool.
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girlinthehole, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 10:16,
closed)
Um BongoMade me laugh a lot! Enjoyed that!
(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 12:32, closed)
Um facking Bongho!Pure Class.
That is all.
(, Mon 21 Jan 2008, 16:28, closed)
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