Drain Bamaged and K2k6 remind me...
This is my own story of automedication.

Around March last year, I had a wart or something similar on the middle finger of my left hand, just on the inside of the top joint. I also had a can of that CO₂ stuff you use on warts. Blasting it once seemed to have had little effect - so, in my impatience, after a couple of days, I gave it another blast, and then attacked my finger with a pair of nail clippers.

There was pain. There was blood. There is - still - a big callous-type thing on my finger, about 30 times bigger than the original wart. And the callous is ugly and painful. The wart wasn't.

I regret mistreating that wart. In a way, I miss it. I almost want it back.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:08, 20 replies)

Enzyme....
Just ew.

Ew.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:09, closed)

Silly!
Your supposed to kiss a frog or something like that to get rid of warts. Doh!
( girlinthehole, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:10, closed)

pft!
Try getting one burnt off your face with liquid nitrogen when you are eleven years old. You kids today, don't know you're born, etc.!

(Despite my neighbour's insistence, charming them, buying them and sprinkling holy water on them does not work. Liquid nitrogen does.)
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:15, closed)

CHCB
They're always charming after your lucky warts.
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:16, closed)

...
If anyone has a way to remove callouses, I'd appreciate it. At the moment, I'm relying on daily use of a pummice-stone... and the occasional use of the same nail clippers that were at the root of the initial problem. That last bit is my version of homeopathy...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:17, closed)

@Sexmonkey
that leprechaun song thing still scares me.

@Enzyme: be careful with the homeopathy. The day you forget to apply the nailclippers will be the day you die of an overdose.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:20, closed)

Photos!
Give us photos of your deformed digit!
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:21, closed)

^ revealing himself on teh Interweb?
*faints*
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:22, closed)

Leprechaun song thing?
Piggly winks?
*sings* Here's the tales of our pal Piggly, Ireland's a land he loves so well.
Getting into adventures so higgledy piggledy, how he gets in trouble only he can tell...

Doo-doo doo-di-doo-doo!
(tiger blood and Adonis DNA, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:26, closed)

Yes! Photos of the callous.
and then CHCB can post pictures of her hula hoop.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:27, closed)

I'd happily post a photo...
But I don't have a digital camera. If you're prepared for me to bung a film in the SLR, finish the film - that could be a while, 'cos I'm not planning a holiday this year or next - get the film developed, take the print to my Dad's (he has a scanner; I don't) and then upload it, though...

Do you want to see a callous that much?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:30, closed)

no
it was tantalising promise of flesh being revealed online. Two can play at this non-PC game.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:33, closed)

Having just looked at Enzyme's Profile
I'm wandering if he's confused a callus (a hard lump of skin) with a kitten (a small fuzzy ball of Aaaaaaaaaah).
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:37, closed)

@Enzyme.
Yes. Yes I do.

phwoargh, hubba-hubba etc.


/not really.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:38, closed)

I believe
the kitten is detachable. And also, could you bring yourself to attack that fluffeh loveliness with a pair of homeopathic nail clippers?
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:38, closed)

I've given this some thought
Callouses are built up, right? By rubbing? Well, if you're scraping that baby with a pumice stone on a regular basis then what you're actually doing is making it bigger and harder.

(Tourettes would have capitalised those last five words but I'm making a serious point here.)
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 16:54, closed)

Hur huh
serious point

*gets coat and goes home for the day*
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:02, closed)

Learn to love the callouses
My hands have callouses on almost every joint - ex-farmer's wife + climbing = callouses

Wearing stockings is a nightmare - I have to put on long black evening gloves just to be able to pull the stockings up!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 17:51, closed)

Oh chickenlady
*takes third cold shower of the day*
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Apr 2008, 22:30, closed)

...
scan the callous?

just an idea...depends how your dad feels about diseased bodily parts on his scanner!
(twiceydrinker hmmm is it pint time?, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 9:02, closed)