This is True, I swear
In high school, I played Football (the American variety) and in the course of one hard fought battle, my best buddy, Carl busted his chin.

It was split wide open, about two inches by one half inch. He figured "I should probably go to the hospital." "Nonsense!" says I. "I am considering medical school and have served with distinction as a lifeguard!"

So, as my Parents had left for the summer home, we repaired to my home where I handed him a beer and said "Start drinking!" About four beers later, I broke out a sewing needle from my Sisters sewing supplies, heated it with a match and attached some polyester thread.

I handed him 4 motrins (pain killers, like that would help) and proceeded to stitch his chin up. 6 PERFECT stitches.

I was so impressed with my work that I drove him to my Sister's house, who is a Nurse. She was absolutely amazed!

The disaster bit? Infection. I failed to thoroughly clean out the wound. Two days later that thing smelled like the funkiest French cheese EVER! Imagine having that stink factory RIGHT beneath your nose! Poor bastard. It's suprising we are still friends frankly. Fortunately however, a couple of shots and some replacement stitches and he was fine.

One STUPID step and all my hard work was for naught!
( Citadel Because the world needs less morons, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 4:29, 2 replies)

Ah but!
Would you have sewn up your own wound.
( girlinthehole, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 8:44, closed)

Sewing up your own wound?
My friend B had, from time to time, a penchant for self-harm. One evening, he set about his arm with a blade of some sort, but then decided that that had been foolish. (No? Really?) So he sewed himself back up again. He was in school the following morning, showing off his handywork...
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Tue 8 Apr 2008, 9:50, closed)