The Mad Artist, Part 3.
One day I was hanging around with the Mad Artist and we were drinking, and he invited me to his birthday party. I eagerly agreed, as I knew that it would be anything but boring.

"So what do you want for your birthday?" I asked him as I opened a new beer.

"There are three things I've always wanted," he replied. "The Library of Congress in a suitcase, a monkey suit and a four foot long tuning fork."

I choked on beer. "What?!?"

"The Library of Congress I've already got- I have a laptop with an Internet connection. And I've kinda got the monkey suit-" he pulled out a carved wooden mask and put it on, then pulled his hair loose into something that looked like Yahoo Serious after pissing on a transformer. "Now I just need the tuning fork."

I considered for a moment, then gave up. "Why the tuning fork?"

"So I can go to Manhattan and stand in the middle of the road and wear my monkey suit, smack the tuning fork on a tree and break every window for a block radius."

Everyone needs ambitions, I suppose...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 30 Oct 2008, 21:26, 9 replies)

More! Click!
I've never heard of or met anyone this eccentric, and I've done my share of hanging round mental hospitals.
(lost, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 21:39, closed)

By all rights
he should be in one- in reality his life is rather sad and tragic. But he does tell good stories...

EDIT: Actually, I will say this much more: ever seen the movie Good Will Hunting? I seriously wonder if Matt Damon and Ben Affleck ever met the Mad Artist, as that character is eerily similar to him.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 30 Oct 2008, 21:43, closed)

*click*
for the image.

beautiful!
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 21:41, closed)

Clicked
for giving me an urge to someday sonically demolish downtown Vancouver with a hand-held instrument.
(Ejaculantern was caught desecrating pumpkins on, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 21:48, closed)

Too bad it wouldn't work.
It's kinda Wiley Coyote physics, unfortunately- the tuning fork trick works be resonant frequency, which varies according to the size and thickness of the glass.

But the idea of him in a monkey suit screaming in traffic in Manhattan is a beautiful one...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 30 Oct 2008, 22:07, closed)

Getting a mental image now.
And for that have a click.
(Big D, Fri 31 Oct 2008, 7:29, closed)

Can't you see if you can get a local metal shop to knock him one up?
Just to see if he follows his wish up?

*re-clickety*
(Nogin the Nog is the good one! Beware Nogbad the Bad!, Fri 31 Oct 2008, 14:49, closed)

Hmmmmm...
You know, I happen to work in a place where we have a lot of machine shops that we deal with... I wonder how much JobShop would charge me to make one from aluminum?...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Fri 31 Oct 2008, 15:21, closed)

This made me giggle like a mad schoolgirl.
On laughing gas.

Being nibbled at by hamsters.

Have a click.

And a woo, for knowing such an odd man.
(LiL_Arsewipe licked your face on, Wed 5 Nov 2008, 19:16, closed)