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IHateSprouts tells us they once avoided getting caught up in an IRA bomb attack by missing a train. Tell us how you've dodged the Grim Reaper, or simply avoided a bit of trouble.

(, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 12:31)
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I have two.
And in both of them the phrase "It seemed like a good idea at the time" is appropriate.
1. Aged 5-ish, and pottering around some town that happened to have a big river in the middle of the town centre, I leaned over the railing and spotted a big fish. "Ooh. Let's try and catch it."
Not entirely sure what happened next but next thing I remember is being several feet underwater, desperately trying to get back to get back to an environment I could breathe and failing miserably. I remember looking down at one point and I swear that fucking fish was right underneath me and laughing his gills off. Luckily a passing troop of Boy scouts had all done lifesaving training and they pulled me out.
2. I suck at cooking which is why my preferred technique tends to be to throw something in the oven and wander off for twenty minutes. In this particular case I did two very,very dumb things. The first was to switch the oven to "Grill" instead. The second was to nip round the corner to get a paper...
I know. I'm going to pause here so I can slap myself for stupidity.
When I came back the smoke stretched from the ceiling all the way down to chest height and flames were coming out of the oven door.
After I'd frantically switched off the oven, dumped the blazing grillsteaks into a sinkful of water and opened every single window I had, I finally finished shouting "fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck" then started wondering why the smoke alarm hadn't gone off.
I have books that still smell of smoke.
(, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 19:58, 1 reply)
put them in a freezer bag with a tumble drier sheet or a tablespoon ful of Bicarb of soda.. kills the smell

(I used to use cloth nappies til one night I fell asleep with them boiling on the cooker )

smouldering stinking motherfuckers.
(, Wed 25 Aug 2010, 21:59, closed)

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