Sancerrely Yours
A pearoast, but appropriate.

A good few years ago I was mooching around my local Asda (unfortunately the only store near enough to home to make shopping there worthwhile) when I spotted a boner feedy bargain - bottles of Sancerre for under a fiver. Partial as I then was to a spot of white, and having recently discovered this particular grape (whilst knowing fuck-all about wine in general), I took all the remaining seven bottles off the shelf and gleefully put them in the trolley.

At the checkout all went smoothly until I saw the price of the wine was almost twelve quid a bottle. I pointed out the error to the cashier, but she was having none of it. "That's not what it says here" etc, etc.

So naturally, I asked if she could call the manager. She didn't, but brought over her till supervisor, who again tried to insist that the wine was correctly priced. Now I'm not big on trading standards, but one thing I do know is that if a shop displays goods as being at a certain price, then they have to be sold at that price. We went over to the shelf, I showed her the ticket that said a fiver a bottle. She saw it, noted it, still insisted their price was right.

Anyway, I stuck to my guns - to the extent that I flatly refused to move from the till until I got that wine for the price stated. I warned people not to form a queue behind me, since I could be some time. They went through the store hierarchy one by one, even brought over the head of the wine department (a snotty, rat-faced turd who insisted that Asda would "never" sell wine of this quality at such a price.) who all insisted the till price was correct. I kept telling them that this was against the law and asking for the manager. My g/f (patient, long-suffering and now my wife) was, as she kept telling me, mortified by the carry-on, muttering through gritted teeth "Just leave it, just leave it". Bollocks I would just leave it. This had gone way past the point of no return.

Eventually the manager arrived and (as I knew he would) heard a brief summary and simply said "Give it to him for a fiver." What else could he do?

So I got eighty-four quid's worth of wine for thirty-five pounds. I marched out of that store to the sound of trumpets ringing in my ears. A triumph for the common man, I thought. Victory for the oppressed Sancerre-swilling masses, I thought. A blow to the pockets of a grasping bastion of capitalism, I thought. The last laugh was mine.

Until I opened the first bottle and found it tasted like cat's piss. "Serves you fucking right," said the other half. I know - I should have taken it back, but the moment had gone and I couldn't be arsed. Oh, well...
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Tue 1 Jul 2014, 22:34, 51 replies)

Nowt wrong with cat's pee smell in Sauvignon Blanc
www.timatkin.com/corktalk?570

Also:

1. Sancerre isn't a grape
2. They most certainly do *not* have to sell the goods to you for the price advertised (see: consensus ad idem & invitation to treat, etc.)
3. That sounds like a bargain to me. No false economy.
4. Asda?
( Ghoti Fingers, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 1:07, closed)

All of this
plus

(5) you massive tit
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 10:08, closed)

'a boner feedy bargain '
So, it gave you a hard-on?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 7:37, closed)

^ bollockhead

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 8:00, closed)

yay you saved a paltry fifty quid by acting like a stupid cunt, well done mate well done

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 9:14, closed)

First timer
First time I ever got invited to someone's place for a 'dinner party', I don't think I'd ever bought wine before but knew it was the done thing to turn up with a bottle. I was an impoverished student at the time so bought the wine with the best volume/price ratio, meaning I ended up with a litre of crap Yugoslavian plonk (you can see how long ago this happened). "How lovely", said my hosts, when I arrived, turning rapidly to the kitchen, no doubt to drop the bottle in the bin. Wine - you get what you pay for.
(Smale is stuffed, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 9:38, closed)

Poor quality wine can make a handy ingredient.
De-glazing roasting tins, or poaching mushrooms, for example.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 10:16, closed)

Sorry...
But the price of the item on the shelf is an invitation to treat and does not consititute a binding contract.
So the shop does NOT have to sell to you at the price on the shelf, but may choose to do so if it wishes to foster goodwill with the customer.
What you ought to take from this, is that they didn't not value your custom enough to sell you that wine at that price, until you caused such
a bloody nuisance that it was cheaper just to sell it to you so you'd fuck off.
(eViLegion Chief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 11:36, closed)

Wow, controversy
I go to sleep and to work and look what happens! Glad to see you've all had something to occupy your time, though. Hate to think of you all sat there, twiddling whatever your twiddling preference happens to be, without someone to slag off.

Firstly: I know fuck-all about wine and neither do I want to. I strongly suspect that the vast majority of what we're sold is average plonk dressed up as quality beverage and my only criteria is whether or not I enjoy drinking the stuff. I don't care whether Sancerre is a grape or the vintner's bell end - it's a point of reference to me.

Secondly: as I pointed out, this is a pearoast. I know about the invitation to treat now, but didn't then. I'm not unpleasant to shop staff, they have shit jobs and don't deserve to be treated badly. If this would have been a small shop I'd have pointed out the mistake and not made a fuss. But I do object to vastly profitable retail conglomerates mislabelling goods and misleading the people who create those profits in the first place. The only way that might make them think twice is to hit them in the pocket, in whatever relatively small way possible. I know they don't suffer and they probably wont learn but it's a minor victory for the common man. And I'll happily take it, thank you very much.

Thirdly: the point of the question is false economy, remember? I think the question of hubris is answered in the story itself and the fact that I ultimately made a twat of myself. The implication of false economy is that a lesson should have been learnt. And it certainly was.

And as for you, Beefy or whatever your name is... You're calling ME smug? Although perhaps I'm wrong. 'My father used to run the Winchester College wine society' obviously qualifies you to pass such damning judgment on others. Prick.
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 13:59, closed)

It's cool how you can recite a section of a post but pretend not to remember a name, it honestly makes you look not upset

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 14:07, closed)

No pretence about it
Just like your reference to fifty quid being paltry is cool. I'm in such awe...
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 14:16, closed)

No need for tears now cheapskate

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 14:27, closed)

Sorry...
... are you feeling left out?
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:01, closed)

nah, it's cool bro, you're handling this well.....

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:05, closed)

Well, it's good to know you're down with the street...
You just get cooler by the letter.
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:16, closed)

great stuff, you aren't embarrasing yourself (again) here or anything
keep up the good work champ
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:20, closed)

Keep digging
The last word is obviously so important to you...
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:46, closed)

Hahaha, you used 'criteria' as a singular noun.
(sorry, love y'all really)
( Ghoti Fingers, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 14:39, closed)

Of course I did
I'm dead common, me
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:50, closed)

Well......
Some good has come from this. I decided to buy a bottle from Waitrose at lunch. Thanks for the inspiration. I had to pay a tenner though but reduced from £12. The end.
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Wed 2 Jul 2014, 15:55, closed)