Ant and Dec
Im sure Im not the first but fuck me if I wouldn't love to cunt them in the fuck. One of thems three inches from being a midget, the other geezers about 95% Downs Syndrome and neither of the geordie fucks are anywhere near funny.

And yet somehow, everyone loves them?!?!?! ITV's Saturday Evening darlings. And before someone says they're nice lads, I've met them twice and they're arrogant, self indulged little wankers.
(McJuurgensHaircut is authorised and regulated by your mum., Fri 5 Feb 2010, 11:10, 3 replies)

Repost from thats me on Tv
t was many moons ago 1998 I think and I was working as a stage tech for the BBC, we were at the NEC in Birmingham at the CBBC Big Bash, a show for kids that featured all of the stars of kids TV on the BBC.

For 3 days I had been working on the main stage that ran a theatre show 4 times a day with Ant n Dec (or PJ and Duncan as they were known as then) as the main hosts.

I was getting pissed off with hearing them on stage singing along to their crappy single 'Let's get ready to rumble' so being the vindictive type I decided to somehow get my own back for such an auditory assault.

My chance soon came, BBC 1 would be broadcasting a live segment of the show for their Saturday morning show 'going live'.

The TV segment consisted of a load of us dressed in funny costumes while a competiton winner arsed around on stage with Ant n Dec trying to avoid the 'monsters' on stage.

I picked a Frankenstein's monster costume and stumbled around the stage getting into character growling here and there.

Finally the director did the countdown and we were live to millions of people across the UK, I got stage fright and thought I can't do this, I may actually hurt someone, I may get fired, I might.... Aww fuck it... There's Ant... and I launched myself straight at him sending him flying, I then spun round to make it look more accidental, luckily he wasn't too badly hurt and soon picked himself up.

Afterwards no-one said anything about it, anyway fuck em, I was in character and it wasn't me it was the Monster.
( Terry Oblong There's nobody here but us chickens on, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 11:17, closed)

Didn't your first meeting with them...
...put you off having the second?

Alternatively, why didn't you take that second opportunity to slap them about a bit. Fool. You may never get another chance
( Another_tragic_case wished he hadn't eaten all the cake, Fri 5 Feb 2010, 11:56, closed)

Not My Choice
The first meeting was in a local kebab house and the second time I played a charity football match, and I did go studs through the retarded one :-)
(McJuurgensHaircut is authorised and regulated by your mum., Fri 5 Feb 2010, 13:42, closed)