Fatto once again.
Fatto, my crazy housemate from uni, even detailing her enjoyment of porn involving cactuses going up people's bums. So yeah, she liked that. And she also, evidently enjoyed shitting under rugs.

Of course the horrors didn't end there. Her bedroom was right next to the living room, so her very vocal sexual activities would often drown out the sound of Neighbours. Each time it was a different man. Well, almost each time. She also had a boyfriend who was the spitting image of Tory Boy, and now I come to think about it might have actually been David Cameron. I digress.

Fatto had a thing for fancy dress. We sane housemates used to dread the nights when she would leave the house, in a size 16 French maid outfit (or thereabouts), as we knew our ears would be assaulted later by the shrieking strains of a whale getting it in the bum. It was always in the bum, she preferred it. She told us that once.

Sometimes her room would smell of poo after she entertained.

In my mind, though, the worst thing I ever heard about her sex life was that she thorougly enjoyed the concept of Noel Edmonds.
( Queen of Cheesecake, Fri 23 Oct 2009, 18:49, 3 replies)

Y'know
yeah, she sounds like a nutter, but a size 16 really isn't all that big.
(berk, Fri 23 Oct 2009, 19:56, closed)

I was just coming through to say just this
It's actually an average these days, and I don't mean because of obesity levels.

I've seen some pretty fat size 16's, but seen many more gorgeously proportioned, and not even remotely obese ones. It's all in how you're built I guess, I can only assume that 'fatty' was of the short and pudgy variety.

At least I'd hope :)
( Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Fri 23 Oct 2009, 22:08, closed)

Numerous clicks
For this and the previous stories which I was not around to click on previously.
(Pope Jamiroquai III, Tue 27 Oct 2009, 13:40, closed)