Well deserved
This was just a few days ago in one of our local pubs. For weeks they were searching for someone who had been putting Rohipnol or something similarly nasty in the drinks of unsuspecting guests. There were probably 8-10 people affected in February alone. And just when everybody thought this would never end, someone caught him red handed. The 22 year old idiot had put a few drops in a beer. Did they hand him over to police? They sure did. Not straight away of course, they first had a little go at him (as in crap was thoroughly beaten out of him). Then the bouncers were clumsy enough to drop him down a flight of stairs at the entrance. 3 times. Did I or any of the 200+ guests see who did it? Did police care? Did they fuck.
( RedWine President of the S.C.U.M., Fri 15 Mar 2013, 17:08, 8 replies)

Revenge spiking
At a club I used to go to, someone started pinching unfinished drinks while punters were on the dance floor. One of my mates was a lab tech at a school, and obtained a quantity of a cyanide antidote known as "liquid Pickfords" - because it shifts anything. Basically it's a fast-acting double-ended emetic.

So a couple of pints were spiked and left temptingly on an empty table. Sure enough, the thieving scrote downed them. He barely had time to register that something was wrong before the potion did its work and reduced him to a shuddering, puking, shitting mess.

Not pretty, not kind, but drinks remained untouched from that day on...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 17:16, closed)

I like this.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 19:00, closed)

Ha. I was never a fan of 'mine-sweeping'.

( 4Q just lurking, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 19:28, closed)

Back in the early 90's I allegedly prepared a small dose of phenolphthalein in a cheese and branston sarnie to punish the twat who used to sneak into the works canteen and rob the staff fridges of other peoples food, namely mine. Its an efficient laxative requiring only a tiny amount but one drop from a pipette was utterly fearsome and the miscreant was off work for a couple of days citing food poisoning to explain his sudden stomach cramps and repeated involuntary soiling of his undercrackers.
Apparently its now being withdrawn as an over the counter laxative due to carcinogenic concerns. Good! I hope he gets arse cancer.
(Finster Ate a cat biscuit for a bet, Sat 16 Mar 2013, 0:22, closed)

Arse Cancer. The least sexy cancer of them all.

( 4Q just lurking, Sat 16 Mar 2013, 0:35, closed)

There's a news report to back this up, of course.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 15 Mar 2013, 17:23, closed)

Are you kidding
we are talking rural Bavaria. Our local newspaper doesn't even have a proper homepage. :-)
( RedWine President of the S.C.U.M., Fri 15 Mar 2013, 17:40, closed)