Oh no, the memories...
I only had a couple of notable fights at school as I tended to just take the lumps because, well, I've done my share of Martial Arts from quite a young age. Knowing that the guy hitting you (generally so badly it doesn't actually hurt) could walk away from the fight on 2 broken legs tends to make up for the fact that actually breaking them would be more trouble than it's worth.

Anyhoo. Once upon a time about 3 weeks before I left school at 18 I got into a SUPERB fight with a guy I can only describe as a complete and utter, unmitigated arse-fucking, wanking flange bastard. Nope, sorry, I STILL haven't gotten across my contempt for him. Still, on with the story.

He decided to take a bit of frustration out on a new kid, about 13 years old, by giving him a slap on the back of the head. He was a bully, and I told him if he did that again I'd ensure he never did it again. This had been brewing and I was seeing red. He laughed and walked off.

About half an hour later we passed in a deserted corridor. Where, rather predictably he asked me quite how I would ensure he would never do it again. Punctuating his words with the odd punch.

Have you ever seen the fight in "Grosse Point Blank"? It was something like that (he was actually quite skilled, in Tae Kwan Do I think it was) but instead of stabbing him in the throat with a pen I broke his wrist. I then put him over my shoulder and walked him screaming and crying like a girl to the school nurse who called him an ambulance.

I then sat outside the headmaster's office, of my own free will, until he came back when I told him exactly what had happened and why it happened. I was, of course in a shit load of trouble, but tempered by the fact that I had done something that all the staff thought was more than appropriate. Off the record, of course.

Don't beat me up for the length, I'm sorry, OK?
(Woodgie is back, but for how long?, Mon 13 Mar 2006, 12:20, Reply)